#words cannot express how sad i am he’s not real

[mihawkhugs]

the leona brainrot is so real ok literally thinking of him and how he would support women AHHH

i wanna hug him too bc i just know he’d smell so nice and warm AND LIONS CAN PURR i wanna hear him purr

dammit i need to touch some grass

[delaber]

A Date (Bucky Barnes x Reader)

Summary: you have a date and Bucky’s not exactly happy about it.

Words: 3.8K

Trope: friends to lovers 💞 with a jealous Bucky trying his best to be brave, and failing horribly.

Notes: another fluff piece to mend Bucky’s heart ❤️ honestly, I have a problem with all these fluffy fics I’ve been writing recently. I just cannot stop myself lol.

"You have a date?" he manages to splutter just before the panic takes over and makes his heart skip a few beats.

Fuck!

A fucking date?!

His fingers are slipping on the wet handle of the pan he's in the midst of cleaning, and in that moment, all he can think about is how happy he is that he's currently bent over the kitchen sink so you can't make out the shocked expression on his face.

You're nodding beside him, playing with the dishtowel you're holding but Bucky can hardly make out what you're saying when you return his question with a quiet "yeah".

His ears are ringing bells and he just wants to get the fuck out of there.

Silently, he's begging for you to stop talking. He doesn't want to know more. Doesn't want to hear what you've agreed to and who you're... - fuck, what if it's someone he knows?

What if it's Sam?!

Shit!

The panic in Bucky's chest runs amok! If he walks in on his two best friends fucking, he's gonna kill himself!

With dread, he realises that he has to know how careful he needs to be around the compound...

"With - uh - with whom?" he clears his throat and curls his toes in prepared mortification, his narrowed gaze firmly fixed on a wet piece of broccoli that's lying lonely and sad at the bottom of the sink.

Please don't say Sam, please don't say Sam...

"You know the cute guy from the coffee shop?" you answer proudly, and it makes Bucky's heart spring violently back to life. That guy??? "- he finally asked me."

Well, it's not Sam - yet somehow, it's worse.

Deep breath, he tells himself and plasters on a neutral expression as he looks up from the pan and directly into your eyes.

At least you look excited, he concludes as he takes in your dreamy little smile that's usually reserved for when vibranium fingers briefly brush over your warm skin but that he now has to share with... him. The moron in the green apron. Mr I'm-too-busy-flirting-with-your-girl-to-get-your-order-right.

Fuck, he's burning up!

"That's great, sweetheart," he hears himself croak from far away, trying his best to sound like he's happy for you and not as if his heart is in the process of being ripped out of his chest. "I'm real happy for you."

"Thanks, Buck," you playfully bump your hip against his while looking down at your hands as you once again twist the towel between your fingers.

You seem almost... nervous. This date must really be a big deal to you.

He gulps and pushes away another incoming wave of nausea. It's not as if he hasn't long ago accepted that nothing will ever happen between the two of you. You're friends. That's it.

"Are you excited?" He asks without really knowing why. He doesn't want to hear your answer. To hear you verbally confirm the look you already have on your face.

Slowly you look up at him and he has to chomp down on his inner cheek to keep himself from doing something stupid.

"You know what?" you ask quietly with a tilt of your head and Bucky's heart starts racing even harder. "- I actually am."

Even you sound surprised - not that Bucky can really blame you.

"Mmh," he merely hums and pretends there's a particularly stubborn area on the dirty pan that needs his attention.

"Is that weird?" You ask.

He can feel how the sincere question in your voice laces itself around his abdomen, squeezing him tight.

Is it wrong of him to want to snap the stupid piece of teflon-coated metal in his hand in half? You're his best friend and he should just be happy you're happy.

Fuck it, he is happy! He loves you more than anything and you deserve to feel this way - he just wishes it was because of him and not someone else.

"No, sweetheart," he mumbles, trying to untie the invisible knot behind his navel as he starts scrubbing again. "Why would it be weird?"

Thankfully, you don't answer.

...

Cold droplets of water are running over your forehead and down the length of your nose, desperately trying to reduce the tension that's been resting right between your eyebrows since your conversation with Bucky last night.

Splashing your face with water is a stupid attempt to make yourself feel better - you know that - it hasn't worked the other times you've tried it and this must be the tenth attempt since you woke up this morning. The only thing that'll truly help is if Bucky would tell you what's going on.

He's been acting weird since last night, and even though you aren't sure what reaction you'd been hoping for, this definitely isn't it. You know he isn't exactly the biggest fan of the man who's taking you out for dinner later, but getting so annoyed he can barely uphold a conversation? Well, that wasn't really a scenario you'd even considered at all...

You suppose you could just tell him the truth - maybe that would make him more accepting of your choice of date - but it's not as if you can really tell him that the only reason you're going on that date to begin with is to force yourself to get over, well, him.

You've known Bucky two years now and apart from small moments here and there, nothing's happened. It's been two excruciating years full of pining and painful almosts and ifs but he clearly doesn't look at you that way and you don't want to keep putting yourself through the heartbreak. You deserve to spend your friday nights with someone who actually sees you for what you are: beautiful, smart, desirable, a woman.

And as you stand looking at yourself in the mirror, you realise that you need this date to get Bucky out of your head. Fuck if he doesn't approve of the cute guy from the coffee shop. It's none of his business who you're going out with and if he wants to be annoyed about it, then so be it.

Yet you still cannot stand the thought of him sitting by himself all night. He hasn't seemed like himself all day and you know how he can spiral over the smallest of things.

Thus, you check for Sam in the kitchen, the gym, and in the spa area in the basement of the compound, but eventually find him in the common room on the third floor, completely hypnotised as he stares at the television screen in front of him, the playstation controller grabbed tightly in his hands.

You do a quick scan around the room to confirm that it's just the two of you before you approach him. "Wilson, have you seen Bucky today?"

"Bucky? Uh - no," Sam mumbles without moving his gaze away from the animated character who's running through an abandoned city. "I assume you've already tried the dark cave he calls his room?"

"I know where he is," you sigh and flop down on the sofa next to him, stretching your legs and putting your feet in his lap. "I was just hoping that maybe you'd talked to him."

He doesn't answer apart from a few incoherent noises you're sure are for the game and not for you, so you poke at the controller with your toes to get his attention. "Sam..."

"Hey! I'm trying to save humanity from a zombie apocalypse here. Keep your stinking feet away from me," he playfully flicks the underside of your foot without sparing you a glance. "I already told you I haven't seen your siamese twin all day."

"Yeah, but do you think you could... go check on him maybe?"

"I'm busy. You go check on him."

"Sam..."

At the sound of your soft-spoken words, Sam sends you a brief side-eye before he finally tosses the controller down on the sofa table with a loud sigh. "What'd you do?"

"I didn't do anything," you shake your head innocently. Is it really your fault that Bucky is too childish to accept the man you're going out with? No.

Sam runs his eyes over you and squints hard. "You guys are usually so dependent, you're practically joined at the hip. And now you want me to go talk to him even though you didn't do anything?"

"Look, he's being weird," you sigh, "- can you just check on him? Please? Maybe have a guy's night in with beer and that stupid zombie-game you're always playing or whatever?" you gesture to the television screen where the character from before stands panting, saying random stuff every few seconds. "I don't want him to be alone."

"First of all, The Last of Us is not stupid!" Sam raises his index finger at you, feigning an insulted huff. "Secondly; a guy's night in..? While you're doing exactly what if I may ask?" he arches an eyebrow, urging you to keep talking.

"I - uh - I have plans," you say quickly and try and look determined although you can feel your entire face heating up. "...a date of sorts."

The dead-panned look on Sam's face is quickly wiped off, instead replaced with an annoyingly broad smirk. "You have a what now?" he chuckles teasingly.

"You heard me," you roll your eyes.

"Oh I heard you loud and clear," he hoots, "you are going on a date!" he says, emphasising the last word with a wriggle of his eyebrows.

"Don't be a dick about it."

"My, oh my. We're finally gonna see what kind of man that can sweep the rug from underneath you."

"Okay, I'm leaving," you make a move to stand up, but Sam interrupts you by putting his palm to your shin.

"Come on, I'm just teasing," he laughs, "tell me about your date. Who's it with? - Not Bucky, I assume."

"Why would I go on a date with Buck?" you shrug nonchalantly although you can once again feel the heat radiating through your every feature. "It's the cute blonde from the coffee house down the street."

"Oooh, the guy who looks like a young Brad Pitt but with humour?"

"That's the one," you press down on your lips and avoid looking directly at Sam. God, this is embarrassing.

"He's a cutie!" Sam teases with a chuckle.

"I know," you play with a loose thread on your shirt, avoiding his eye.

"Then why aren't you more excited about it?" He asks but immediately emits a groan, "Jesus... do not tell me it's because of Bucky?!"

"I'm worried about him," you whine and bury your face in the sofa cushions.

Sam rolls his eyes. "You're going on your first date in forever and you're worried about that sourpuss?"

"Sam, you didn't see the look on his face when I told him about it! He hates the guy - I think it really upset him."

"Of course it upset him," Sam scoffs, "It's like taking candy away from someone who really wants to fuck said candy!"

Your eyes snap over to Sam in an instance. Completely taken off guard, your voice dies in your throat. Did he just...? No, surely, you must've misheard.

"Come on, don't pretend you haven't noticed," Sam groans, "I swear to god, he's two days away from crawling behind you just so he can lick the ground you're walking on!"

The earth has stopped spinning. "W-what?"

"The puppy eyes? The 'pick me' behaviour?" he rolls his eyes at your shocked face.

Your heart starts pounding so fast you can barely keep up. "Are we talking about... Bucky? As in our Bucky?"

"Uh, huh," Sam nods as if it's the most obvious thing on the planet. "That guy's practically begging you to take him by the hand and lead him to your bed. He's so in love with you, it's disgusting to look at."

"He's what?!" You exclaim loudly, completely out of breath. This is definitely news to you! "No, no, no! Bucky's not in love with me, we're friends," you pant with the blood rushing past your ears.

Sam shoots you an unimpressed side-eye, "yeah keep telling yourself that"

"What do you mean?" you pant, trying to puzzle together Sam's suspicion with your disbelief.

"I swear to god, the two of you don't even have a single brain cell put together..." he rolls his eyes, "I've seen that boy almost snap his neck because you were laughing and he wanted to know what you were laughing at. Trust me when I say that he's not annoyed that you're going on that date - he's jealous."

Well... fuck!

...

You don't think you've ever been this nervous as you pace the hallway outside Bucky's bedroom. You've been here ten minutes now, desperately trying to force yourself to actually make contact with him, but you're holding yourself back. There's so much on the line and what if Sam's incorrect? Then, you will truly have mucked up and everything between you and Bucky will be ruined.

Shit!

You stop pacing. You can hear his favourite album from the forties playing on the other side of the wall but apart from that, there hasn't been a single sound from in there.

You pray he's in a better mood than when you walked in on him angrily hunched over his bowl of cereal this morning, but the fact that he put on the only type of music that can calm him down, doesn't really scream 'put-together'.

It makes you even more nervous though you know you have to talk to him at some point. It's not as if you can avoid him forever - so before you can truly think about the upside of postponing the inevitable conversation, you raise your knuckles and carefully knock on his door.

Everything inside you tenses up. You vision becomes blurry, and you seem to automatically focus all your attention on the sounds coming from inside his room. There's a short shuffle, a sigh and then an irritated "what?!" muttered from somewhere behind the walls.

This is bound to go wrong.

You consider running away and pretend you've never even been near his room, but it's too late to back out now. You have to talk to him at some point, you remind yourself.

With your nerves running wild and the blood pumping through your every vein, artery, and fibre, you open the door a little and poke your head inside his room with a small "hi," your throat so dry it comes out as a hoarse whisper.

He's sitting on the bed with his long legs crossed at the ankles, his hand buried inside a book that's lying closed in his lap. He looks angry at everything and everyone - as if he's minutes away from strangling someone - but when he finds your eyes from across the room, the tense muscles in his cheeks seem to unclench a little.

"Oh, hey," he breathes and runs a hand through his hair in embarrassment, licking his lips. "I thought you were Sam..."

You smile, so relieved to see him softening that you automatically step inside his room without waiting for him to ask you to. "Sorry to disappoint."

"You're not," he shakes his head with a small gulp, "I thought you'd left already. Don't you have that big date?" he asks in a weird voice and sends you a stiff smile.

"Not until seven," you shrug and sit down next to him on his bed, immediately noticing how he's started avoiding your gaze.

"Right," he nods and occupies himself by putting his book on his bedside table. "So - uh - still looking forward to it?"

How do you tell your best friend that no, you're not looking forward to it because he's the one you really want to go out with?

"I don't know," you shrug, suddenly so anxious your temples have started pounding, "not really."

He finally looks up at you again, his slate blue eyes jittery as they meticulously search your face. "What happened?" He asks with tightly knitted eyebrows, "you were so excited for it yesterday."

You hesitate. "...Honestly?"

"Yeah, honestly," he sits up a little straighter, a serious look on his face, "- he didn't upset you, did he?" He says on impulse, his voice suddenly dark and dripping with venom at the mere thought as he reaches out for you and puts his fingers on your arm.

"No Buck," you shake your head and take a deep breath to get your pulse under control. "He didn't upset me."

"Then what?" He squeezes your arm softly, his eyes concerned as he tries to read you, "you can tell me anything."

"I know... It's just that..." you hesitate and consider ending your sentence with I'm in love with you, but the words die in your throat.

"What sweetheart?" he shuffles a little closer to you.

"Bucky," you heave a big breath of air to prepare your bold question that can potentially change everything between you dependant on his answer. "Do you not want me to go on that date?"

"What?" his eyes immediate travel over your face and you can almost hear his pulse running haywire as his fingers let go of your arm. "What makes you think that?"

"It's just..." your breathing picks up as you scan his every anxious feature. It makes you anxious too. "- you started acting weird the minute I told you about it. You've been avoiding me all day."

His fingers find your arm again, his grip a little tighter than before as he desperately looks at you. "No, no, no, sweetheart! That's not what happened," he licks his lips and plasters on the fake smile he's been practising in the mirror all day. "- I mean... I'm not the biggest fan of the guy but who you're dating is really none of my concern. I'm sure he's great, and as long as he treats you well, I'll make sure he stays on my good side," he says softy and sends you a smile that seems a little too genuine for your liking.

You hesitate again as you check his face for cracks, but his smile stays intact and happy. "...So you're really okay with it?" you ask in a small voice, mortified.

"Are you kidding me? Sweetheart, of course I'm okay with it!" he slides his fingers down your arm, capturing your hand inside his fist. "I really just want you to be happy. That's what's important. And you deserve to be taken care of for once instead of being stuck here with me and Sam." He reassuringly squeezes your fingers tight, but it just feels as if he's in the process of letting you go.

Slowly, you can feel your heart breaking.

You knew it... You knew Sam was wrong. Bucky isn't in love with you. Never has been. Never will be. Things are exactly the way they've always been and you're left pining after a man who doesn't want you back.

God, you feel like a idiot for getting your hopes up like that.

"Good," you nod resolutely, fighting hard to not let the heartbreak slip through your well-feigned mask. "I'm happy to hear you feel that way."

"Of course I do," he smiles solemnly.

"I should probably go get ready then..."

"Yeah," Bucky nods and lets go of you. "It's almost six."

With a sigh you hope he doesn't hear, you stand up from his bed and brush down the front of your jeans, not really sure you even want to leave his room.

He's looking up at you like a deer caught in headlights. "Have fun," he says while his hands grab the sheets underneath him, fisting the fabric. "- can't wait to hear all about it."

"Thanks, Buck," you feign a smile to match his, "I'll see you tomorrow."

"See you, sweetheart..."

You turn around with a wave of your hand, but the smile on your face falters the minute you've turned on your heel.

You can hear his heavy breathing over the music playing in the corner, and when you reach out for the door handle, a delicate sound finally breaks the reticence between you.

"Don't go..."

At first, you're not sure if you're imagining it, but then you hear him shuffling behind you, and when you turn around and face him, he's on his feet. "Don't go on that date," he whimpers in defeat, "I'm begging you. Please... don't go."

"Bucky..."

"I'm in love with you," he says guiltily with a gulp.

Your heart stops.

"- and I can't pretend I'm okay with you going on dates when I'm not."

You're completely speechless. You want to comment on everything. Run to him and proclaim that you're his. That you've always been his. But you're nailed to the spot and all that manages to escape your lips is a tight whimper.

"- I know it's probably not what you want to hear right now..." he closes his eyes and looks as if he's in pain. "And I know I'm risking everything by telling you this," he gulps, "but I've been keeping it in for so fucking long, trying to protect our friendship. I just can't keep pretending I don't want... more. It's stupid, I know."

"Bucky, it's not stupid," you finally manage to croak and it's as if the force that've been gluing you to the spot finally lets go. "It's not," you whisper as you take a few long strides over to him, stopping right before your chests touch. "It's not stupid," you repeat and reach a hand upwards, caressing his bearded chin.

His eyes are glistening, and his breathing is coming in ragged as he searches your face. "Sweetheart," he gulps in confusion, "I don't... - what does this mean?"

"It means -" your hand reaches up so it can rake through his hair, coming to a halt on the back of his neck where you can feel the goosebumps travel through his entire body. "- that I'm in love with you too. Have been for quite some time. Since I met you, actually."

Now it's his turn to be glued to the spot.

His mouth falls a little open and you can tell by the look on his face that he's in the process of questioning everything, so you underline your confession by putting your forehead to his. "I want to be yours," you whisper and observe him closely.

At first, he tenses even harder, but then a small smile starts tugging on his lips as he finally relaxes in your arms and pulls you closer. "I want you to be mine, too," he declares sweetly as his heart blossoms in his chest. He reaches down and kisses your cheeks, your nose, your forehead.

"It's you," he whispers against your skin, "- It's always been you."

"Kiss me," you beam and almost cannot stop smiling silly when you reach up for his mouth, finally claiming the softest, most pillowy lips you've ever had the pleasure of kissing.

[raysrays]

Crimson Guardian NSFW

Kyojuro Rengoku x Wife! Reader

18+ MDNI!🚫

CW: NSFW Content, minor angst, controlling/manipulating behavior, fluff-ish.

Y/N POV

Scenario : You've recently married into the respected Rengoku family, and while you continue your work as a demon slayer, life starts to get a bit messy. Balancing your duties becomes a real challenge as you navigate the challenges of married life. You find yourself having to make tough choices just to keep your husband happy, all while debating to stay true to yourself and your calling as a demon slayer.

Marriage. Truly one of the most beautiful milestones a couple can achieve. Marrying Kyojuro has undoubtedly been my greatest accomplishment.

I still remember it vividly, as if it were yesterday. Surrounded by friends, family, and core members, we pledged our lives to each other. Though it wasn't the most glamorous wedding ever seen, it was enough. Because really, all I've ever wanted was Kyojuro, and now, finally, I have him.

For the first few months, our marriage was nothing short of perfect. I moved into the Rengoku estate with Kyojuro's family, assisting Shenjuro with chores and gradually trying to get closer to Shinjuro. Though I'm not sure how successful I was.

It was only six months in that I realized being a demon slayer and a wife wasn't as easy as I thought.

Before our relationship, I was Kyojuro's Tsuguko. He was simply my mentor, and I trained hard under him to get myself where I am today. It was later down the road that we noticed each other's lingering gazes, the occasional flirting, and all the other subtle hints of wanting to be more.

Kyojuro was strong, and I knew he wanted a family, but I simply wasn't ready to give up training and my duties as a demon slayer just yet.

Every day, after helping out around the estate, I would hike over to HQ and pick up where I had left off the previous day, training until the late hours of the night. I would often come home exhausted, which usually caused Kyojuro to worry. As much as I reassured him, he never seemed fully convinced.

Now, here I was, sitting at the dinner table with Kyo across from me. It was a rare occasion for us to eat alone together like this. We made small talk about our day and training, and then he finally stopped eating and put his silverware down.

"Little Flame, I think it’s time we have a serious discussion about the way things have been as of late,” his usual happy smile seemed almost nervous.

I set my spoon down on my plate, giving him my full attention.

“Yes? What is it?”

“Sunflower, you have been working so hard as of late, and it’s quite admirable. I truly admire your dedication to the demon slayer corps and your training!”

“But…?” I ask, confused.

“But… since our marriage, I’ve found myself in constant worry over you. Every time you go on a mission without me, I have to painfully wait for your return. Not knowing whether or not you'd be injured or even-“

“Dead?” I finish.

I saw his body tense up at the word.

“Yes, my love. Dead. I cannot even bear the thought of you never returning to me. It pains me to my core,” he seemed so sad, so worried about me.

I know Kyojuro, I know he didn’t mean anything bad by what he was saying. However, I felt almost offended. He too was a slayer, a hashira. I also had to deal with the fear of him returning with serious injuries or even never returning at all.

Did he believe me to be incapable of protecting myself? He was the very one who trained me. Even though I knew Kyojuro was strong, much stronger than me, it just felt like he lacked faith in me.

“You don’t think I’m strong enough anymore? Do you think marriage has made me soft?” I realized I might have come off a little too harsh, but my emotions were getting the best of me.

His expression seemed surprised, but I could tell. While he may not have used those words, that was definitely the gist of it.

I watched him get up from his place at the table and walk over to me. He pulled my chair out from under the table, then grabbed my hands and kneeled down in front of me.

His big, bright eyes were now staring up at me.

“You are one of the strongest people I know, my love. I know how capable you are, but please remember…”

He brought my hands to his lips, kissing them softly.

“You are my wife before you are a demon slayer. I cannot risk sending you off only for you to never return.”

I could practically hear the desperation and love in his voice.

Kyojuro wasn’t someone who would usually discourage anyone from pursuing something they're passionate about. So if he was now, I knew that it’s something he’s been internally battling with for a while.

“What about you? Is it not the same? What about my worry? What if you never come home to me?” I could feel my face start to heat up. Everything he was saying seemed to come from genuine care, but it felt so hypocritical.

“I am a Hashira, my little flame. I have a certain responsibility you do not have to burden yourself with. I shall retire soon, in just a few years. So please…”

There’s no way he’d ask me-

“Please retire your sword, Y/N. Please stay home for me. Please allow my heart to rest easy knowing you'll be here waiting for me whenever I shall return,” his voice was pleading.

I felt so conflicted. I’d worked so hard. All of these years of training to hopefully become a high-ranking swordsman myself. However, at the same time, I never stopped to consider my romantic life and how being married would affect things.

We both sat there in silence for a few moments, and I finally rose up from the chair, pulling him up off his knees along with me.

I looked up at him, reaching my hand up to rest on his cheek.

“Kyojuro, you are the only one I would retire my sword for. So please promise me, promise me you will always come home to me. Until the day you yourself retire.”

“I promise you, Sunflower. As long as I know you are safe and waiting for me, there is no demon that could ever keep me away.”

I felt his hand on my lower back and the other holding up my chin.

We both leaned in, our lips meeting in a tender kiss.

This kiss started so gently, so lovingly at first. As we pulled away for just a moment, staring into each other’s eyes, we realized how long it had been since we really enjoyed each other’s company.

After that, the kiss only grew hotter and more passionate.

Kyojuro swept me off my feet and carried me straight to our shared room at the back of the estate, the most private spot. It seemed fitting for newlyweds, after all.

As he gently laid me back on the soft futon, I couldn't help but stay focused on him. Kyojuro was simply beautiful. His hair, his eyes, his body, everything about him looked like he was perfectly sculpted.

My admiration was interrupted as I felt him begin to kiss me again. One of his hands traveling to my breasts, gently squeezing it.

The other massaging my thigh.

I feel him pull away from me starting to kiss on my neck traveling all the way down to my chest.

Kyojuro had always known my weak points and how to make me say yes to his every request. He knew my body just as well as I did, and now he was taking full advantage of that knowledge.

I could feel him pressing against me as he moved his hand down my body, lightly touching me. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him closer to me, wanting more.

Then I heard, Kyojuro's soft voice whisper these words, almost as a demand. "Enjoy this little flame, you've kept me waiting far too long.”

As soon as those words left his lips, I felt myself begin to relax. His movements were so gentle, so careful, so loving.

His fingers trailed down my sides, sending chills through my body. His hands went back up and caressed my neck, making me tremble. He kissed me once more, and I melted into him.

It was as if he had cast a spell over me, and all I could do was obey him. He was completely in control of me.

After a moment, I felt him move back down and remove my underwear, revealing my already wet entrance. His hand slid between my thighs, and I couldn't help but let out a moan as his finger slipped inside me. He was gentle at first, just barely grazing me, but it felt incredible.

"Is this okay?" he asked softly, his breath hot against my ear.

I nodded but I could tell that wasn’t enough for him.

“Use your words my love.” He demanded sweetly.

“Yes Kyo, it’s perfect.” I said, my voice trembling.

He leaned down and kissed my lips before pulling back again, smiling at me.

"I want to be inside of you," he whispered, his voice filled with desire.

"Please," I begged.

He removed his fingers, replacing them with his cock, his tip rubbing against my clit.

"Good girl," he whispered, thrusting into me.

I threw back my head, arching my back and digging my nails into his shoulders. His movements were slow and deep at first and then they became faster and harder, and soon my whole body began to shake. I couldn't stop the moans from escaping my lips, and I couldn't help but beg for more.

When he starts to speed up I know we are both about to reach our limit.

I feel his fingers interlock with mine and his lips pressing against mine again, but this time, he wasn’t just kissing me, he was also letting his teeth graze my bottom lip.

He was biting down hard enough to draw blood.

We were both so close and we were both trying to hold back but we couldn’t anymore. We were finally going to let ourselves release.

I was the first one to let myself go, arching my back as I moaned his name.

Then he followed not too far behind.

After he finishes, we just lay there for a bit catching our breath.

“I love you, Y/N,” he finally breathed out, turning his head to look at me.

I turned to face him as well. “I love you, Kyojuro.”

After that, the two of us drifted off in each other's arms for the rest of the night.

The next morning when I awoke, I was still trapped wrapped in Kyojuro's arms.

After a bit of struggling, I managed to maneuver my way out and make it to the kitchen.

There I saw Senjuro, who was already preparing breakfast for everyone.

“Good morning, Sen,” I greeted with a yawn.

“Oh, good morning, Y/N!”

“I'm almost finished with breakfast. Is my brother awake yet?”

“He should be awake soon. We both have to see Master Kagaya today,” I said, rubbing my eyes.

He stopped to turn and look at me.

“Did something bad happen?” he asked nervously.

Poor Senjuro always assumes the absolute worst in every situation. Well, I suppose in this case it’s somewhat understandable.

“No, Sen, nothing's wrong. Kyojuro and I are just going to inform Master Kagaya of my retirement. That’s all.”

He gave a puzzled look.

“Retirement? Why? Haven’t you been training for years to improve your sword skills to move up in the ranks?” he asked.

He was right. I know I shouldn’t go back on my word to Kyojuro, but I really was having second thoughts about my decision.

Senjuro could probably sense my doubt because his next response was:

"If this is something that you're not sure of, then you shouldn't do it. If you have doubts about this decision, then maybe you're not ready for retirement just yet."

His words really struck a chord with me.

Maybe he was right.

Before I could ponder that any further, Kyojuro had made his way into the kitchen.

"Good morning! How are my two favorite people doing?" he said cheerfully.

I smiled.

"Morning, Kyo. Did you sleep well?"

"I did, actually. Thank you, little flame," he walked over to me, giving me a kiss.

I could feel my chest tightening, nervous about what was to come.

The whole time at breakfast, I felt so spaced out. All I could hear was Kyojuro and Senjuro talking and the occasional grunt from Shinjuro drinking away at the table.

“Sunflower? Are you okay?”

I was snapped out of my daze by Kyojuro waving a hand in front of my face. All three of them were staring at me, kind of concerned.

“Oh, yeah, I’m fine. Sorry.”

I shook my head a little and looked down at my plate. I felt bad for Senjuro going through all that trouble to cook, but I simply couldn’t eat right now.

After we finished breakfast, Kyojuro and I headed out.

The thought that this would be the last time wearing my uniform with my sword by my side was so weird and almost uncomfortable to me.

I knew that this day would come eventually, but I always hoped in the back of my mind that Kyojuro would be the one to retire before me.

I had been so focused on training and my duties as a demon slayer that it had never even occurred to me how my marriage would affect everything.

I was now a wife. My first priority should be the estate, and helping Shinjuro while he was in his state of grief, and being there for Senjuro as well.

It wouldn’t be right of me to go against my husband's wishes either. Especially after the intimate moment we shared. Right?

As we made it to HQ waiting to speak with the master I felt my heartbeat racing inside of me.

The room was quiet, I could feel Kyojuro’s eyes lingering on me but I couldn’t bring myself to face him right now.

Both mine and Kyojuro’s attention was shifted as we heard the door open and Master Kagaya entered the room.

"Rengoku, Y/N. It's a pleasure to see you both," Kagaya said, his face as warm as ever.

"It's wonderful to see you too, Master," I replied.

"So what brings you two here? It seems urgent, judging by the fact that you came in so early."

"It is very urgent," Kyojuro began.

He then proceeded to explain our conversation from the night before, and how I was considering retiring.

"Y/N, this is a big decision, and it's important that you feel comfortable and confident in it. Do you think you can fully retire, knowing you won't be able to assist the demon slayers as you are now?" Kagaya asked.

I looked at the master and then glanced at Kyojuro. He seemed so proud and happy that we were here. I could feel the warmth radiating from him.

But, I could also sense the worry in his expression. He was nervous, scared almost.

I couldn't do that to him.

"Master, I've spent most of my life training for the opportunity to become a hashira. To serve the demon slayer corps and protect those who cannot protect themselves. But...I'm no longer just a demon slayer. I'm also a wife, and as such, I think it's only right that I focus on that," I answered.

The room fell silent for a moment.

"If you truly feel this is the right choice, then we support you, Y/N," Kagaya finally spoke.

"Thank you, Master," I bowed.

"Thank you so much, Master! I will never

forget your kindness!" Kyojuro bowed as well.

The two of us left the room and started to head out.

As we exited, we ran into a few of the other Hashira, who asked us about what we had gone to see Master Kagaya about.

They too seemed surprised and a little concerned when Kyojuro explained to them that I would be retiring so soon.

I could tell some of their reactions to the news annoyed Kyojuro. Shinobu used the word “controlling,” and you could see his smile almost falter.

"Controlling" was never a word I would have used to describe my husband. He just loves me, right? He wants to protect me. There's no way my sweet and kind Kyo would ever do anything to control or manipulate me.

Right?

Part Two

[alonetimelover]

pairing: Harry Styles x book writer!reader

fc: Saoirse Ronan

summary: YN just released her debut book, and it became the hot topic online. It might have something to do with certain someone being spotted buying it.

a/n: comments to all those posts are long, because i wanted to somehow incorporate the plot of the book that book writer!reader wrote!

masterlist taglist

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yourinstagram

liked by fallinloveinbooks, user49 and 89 202 others

yourinstagram Those are the notebooks in which I wrote my little baby. I can't believe I am typing this, but 'Silver Lining' is out !!! You can buy it at all independent London bookstores. I can't wait for your reviews. I'll read them all.

view all 8 201 comments

yourbestfriend MY BEST FRIEND IS AN AUTHOR !!! JANE AUSTEN WHO ???

⤷ yourinstagram do not disrespect the legend here

fallinloveinbooks OMG i've been following you since that one post about understanding fantasy world and being allowed to incorporate real world in it! i can't wait to read it, im going to the store right now!

⤷ yourinstagram YOU. ARE. THE. SWEETEST. and i remember you from that post and all that came after. I LOVE YOU and will wait for your words!

user92 what is the genre of the book?

⤷ yourinstagram it's fantasy! but there are a few subgenres. i'd say romance and mystery play a huge role in this book, too!

user109 will it be available online? im from us and would love to read your book!

⤷ yourinstagram unfortunately, not in a foreseeable future

⤷ user109 oh no, why??

⤷ yourinstagram being completely transparent, i released this book using my own money- no publishing house involved - because no one was really interested in it. what is in the stores is the printing i was able to afford. hopefully, they will sell and i'll be able to print more editions.

⤷ user102 im crossing my fingers for you

hArrysbtch i was looking for some new fantasy books, you are sent from heaven

⤷ yourinstagram hope you like it, angel

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harryupdates

liked by hArrysbtch, yourbestfriend and 80 393 others

harryupdates HARRY outside of the independent bookstore in London today! EDIT: because all of you are asking, he apparently bought 'Silver Lining' by YN YSN !

view all 2 202 comments

hArrysbtch I've just finished that book and OMG OMG OMG, i don't know what to tell you, but he's getting into something so beautiful so structured so sad, i can't say enough.

⤷ harrysmoustache so it's worth it?

⤷ hArrysbtch YES. YES. YES. absolutely. from the first page to the last, it just consumes you. yn did such a good job, and it's her first book ever!

⤷ harrysmoustache oh, i can't find it online

⤷ hArrysbtch it's only at independent bookstores in London. no publishing house was involved, she printed all the copies available with her own money. i can buy it for you and send it?

⤷ harrysmoustache i DMed you!

stylesbabie harry in his book girl era

harrysmylife he is back and he is reading, he's just like me

user102 there's no way he has that book and i don't

fallinloveinbooks I've read it, and I loved it. I hated it because of how much it made me cry. Harry, you're in for a ride a wild one with all the *wink*wink* scenes and the most heartbreaking chapters of literature I've ever come upon

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yourinstagram

liked by harrystyles, yourbestfriend and 173 302 others

yourinstagram I cannot express how thankful I am for you and your love for my book. Unfortunately, for now, there are no copies available. But im trying to make it work. But maybe it wasn't meant to be...

view all 10 202 comments

yourbestfriend that's a bestseller book if you ask me

⤷ yourinstagram you are the love of my life

hArrysbtch not you using the last line of the book, like it didn't tear my heart open

hArrysbtch thank god it's already on my bookshelf, happy that it broke my heart and made me horny

⤷ yourinstagram Those were the emotions I wanted people to feel!

harrysmoustache my copy is flying to me, and I can't wait to read it

⤷ yourinstagram ill be waiting for your review!

user102 read, loved, cried and read again

⤷ yourinstagram two times??? i could smother you in kisses

⤷ user102 i wouldn’t mind that

user292 can't explain how unique and original it is

⤷ yourinstagram ❤️

user939 not harry lurking in the likes

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harryupdates

liked by hArrysbtch, harrysmoustache and 128 402 others

harryupdates HARRY and writer YN YSN out and about in London today!

view all 6 080 comments

hArrysbtch Alexa play that should be me by Justin Bieber

hArrysbtch she's mine harry, fuck off

hArrysbtch what is it that whenever I find someone to obsess over they become somehow connected to harry

hArrysbtch but, i smell couple material !!!

harrysmoustache he's gonna be the inspiration spark

⤷ hArrysbtch don't even start! i read silver lining with Harry in mind as one of the main characters

⤷ harrysmoustache as Emrys, right?

⤷ hArrysbtch yes! my protective and sexy bookboyfriend

⤷ user102 I see, we support complicated men here, i love it

stylesbabie they look so good together

⤷ user02 their backs are towards the camera...

⤷ stylesbabie shhh

harrysmylife I love her style !!!!

user402 she's getting so much attention from it. how did she manage this pr?

⤷ hArrysbtch pr???

⤷ user402 don't tell me it doesn't look like one?

⤷ hArrysbtch yeah, I forgot. every woman harry is seen with is just pr or the one to hate. of course. tpwk does not include woman harry is involved with?

⤷ harrysmoustache burnt!!!

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bloomsbury

liked by yourinstagram, yourbestfriend, harrystyles and 40 492 others

bloomsbury Our newest pea in the Bloomsbury pod is the sweetest, London based, young author who has just published her debut novel. We are here to help and tell you that 'Silver Lining' is coming to all bookstores in the world and to online shopping as well on the 15th of November. To feel whole again.

view all 2 202 comments

yourinstagram I LOVE MY NEW POD

yourbestfriend DONT FORGET ABOUT ME WHEN YOU BECOME FAMOUS

⤷ yourinstagram NEVER

harrystyles Congratulations, YN ❤️

⤷ yourinstagram well, thank you, harry

hArrysbtch my favourite author is getting famous!!!

fallinloveinbooks I CANT BELIEVE IT !!! congrats, yn!!

⤷ yourinstagram thank you, sweets!

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fallinloveinbooks

liked by hArrysbtch, harrysmoustache and 6 492 others

fallinloveinbooks I'm attending YN's 'meet the writer' thingy in London and I cannot express how much appreciation I have for her. She thought every little detail in 'Silver Lining' through to make the book perfect. An icon!

view all 211 comments

hArrysbtch I am here too! And I love her so much!

harrysmoustache you need to either film some moments or just post-stream it for us!

stylesbabie she looks so beautiful

user102 I am here as well! we need to meet up!

⤷ hArrysbtch im in the second row!

⤷ user102 are you the one with a pixie cut?

⤷ hArrysbtch Yes, that's me!

⤷ fallinloveinbooks I think im sitting next to you, hArrysbtch

user42 come on guys, let us now what are the questions and answers!

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dailymail

liked by hArrysbtch, user102 and 103 393 others

dailymail NEW COUPLE ALERT? Harry Styles and newly established writer YN YSN were seen leaving the same restaurant (Styles a few moments after YSN). YN independently published her debut novel just two months ago and then signed a contract with Bloomsbury publishing house after Harry had been seen buying her book. For more photos and information, visit the link in our bio!

view all 19 302 comments

user102 not you making harry the only reason she got the contract

hArrysbtch she got a contract because of the interest her book sparked online, not harry

harrysmoustache i'll just leave it here but literally Neil Gaiman praised this book online

user402 oh yes, when the privilege is striking

user99 you just cannot stop taking photos of people in their free time, invading their privacy, can you?

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yourinstagram

liked by harrystyles, yourbestfriend and 201 392 others

yourinstagram Somethin' is cookin'. And that's the audiobook of "Silver Lining" voiced by me! It will be available on 23rd of December as podcast episodes on Spotify for more of you to enjoy! Merry early Christmas!

PS: there may or may not be someone else to accord their voice to Emrys

view all 19 292 comments

yourbestfriend i could be Rhiannon

⤷ yourinstagram you were laughing your ass off after two lines

⤷ yourbestfriend not my fault that Rhiannon is the comedy queen

harrystyles 📖🎤

hArrysbtch NO WAY! i adore your voice and now i'm gonna picture you as Rhiannon - this book just became even better (it already was perfect, i don't how you're doing it"

⤷ yourinstagram hopefully, i won't end up as her

fallinloveinbooks my dream came true. i usually have such a hard time reading that audiobooks are the only option. now i'm going to listen to my favourite chapter over and over again

⤷ yourinstagram which ones are your favourite?

⤷ fallinloveinbooks definitely 6, 15, 24, 33 and 42

⤷ hArrysbtch all the chapters that depicts love - i see you

⤷ fallinloveinbooks yes! the thing is that number 6 refers to love and all those chapter number's are either 6 or add up to 6

hArrysbtch wait wait wait, i've just realised. what if harry is voicing Emrys????

⤷ harrysmoustache don't give me hope

⤷ fallinloveinbooks that would be perfect

⤷ user102 i'm not ready to listen to chapter 24 and 33 with him voicing it

⤷ hArrysbtch i will die, literally. those scenes are intense!

user102 she just wants people to be able to read the book and not care about paying bundle and having shitty quality. i love her.

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harrysupdates

liked by hArrysbtch, fallinloveinbooks and 109 393 others

harryupdates HARRY and YN at the market in Clonakilty, Ireland!

view all 6 001 comments

hArrysbtch someone tell me is that her home town?

⤷ fallinloveinbooks yes, it is! her parents still live there!

⤷ hArrysbtch meeting parents? oh god, they are serious serious

fallinloveinbooks they live that small town romance book lives

⤷ user102 so true! i need her to write something like this!

⤷ hArrysbtch i would eat it up

stylesbabie Niall is proud right now

harrysmylife i can't express how much i love domestic harry

user20 she started the thunder online after *possibly* announcing that harry will voice Emrys and decided to step away from socials. i love her. i love her. i love her.

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irishharry

liked by harryupdates, hArrysbtch and 23 403 others

irishharry How thin are the chances to meet Harry in a small Irish town? Very thin. But not thin enough to be impossible. I MET HARRY FREAKING STYLES AND THE LEGEND HERSELF YN YSN !!!

view all 2 022 comments

hArrysbtch they look so cosy... i want what they have

⤷ fallinloveinbooks a man?

⤷ hArrrysbtch yuck, i only like fictional men + harry

harrysmoustache this ken's job is walk

harryupdates this is very aestheticly pleasing photo

stylesbabie small town!harry is my favourite

user102 hopefully the inspiration is overflowing because i'm reading silver lining for the third time

⤷ hArrysbtch are you okay???

⤷ user102 nope. i just love torturing myself

fallinloveinbooks the matching coats...

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yourinstagram

liked by harrystyles, yourbestfriend and 401 100 others

yourinstagram my love in your heart...

view all 14 292 comments

yourbestfriend answer my calls, yn !!!

⤷ yourinstagram i won't tell you

harrystyles ...my heart in your palm

hArrysbtch I LOVE THE SOFT LAUNCH

hArrysbtch PARENTS

harrysmoustache i love how we all know that this is harry but at the same time it doesn't have to be

⤷ hArrysbtch it better be! this post just cured all my mental problems

fallinloveinbooks the caption... is it the title?

⤷ user102 look at harry's comment, it might be a main thing in her next novel/short story collection

⤷ hArrysbtch the inspiration sparked and inspiration was harry. that's it. when it's published i can die happily

⤷ user102 decide, that or harry voicing Emrys

⤷ hArrybtch im chronically online, don't require any consistency from me

harryupdates vacation in a small irish town birthed some masterpiece, i just know it

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a/n: i have part 2 made in my mind already. do we want more of them?

[jukeboxsweethearttt]

Liquid Smooth

Anthony Bridgerton x Fem Reader

cw: angst:( , Anthony being a butt hole but a sad butthole, no use of y/n i think, reader is kinda insufferable.

(loosely inspired by Liquid Smooth by Mitski (if you can’t tell by now I love doing this) enjoy!)

this ask!

The grand estate loomed ahead, its pristine facade bathed in the soft glow of the setting sun. You had always admired its beauty but tonight it almost seemed almost mocking.

Inside those walls your husband, Anthony awaited.

The man who had captured your heart and now seemed to be slipping away.

As you entered your husband’s study he was there, his posture stiff, eyes fixed on the fireplace.

The silence between you was heavy, filled with unsaid words and unhealed wounds.

"Anthony."

You began, your voice trembling slightly.

We need to talk."

He turned to face you, his expression unreadable.

"About what, precisely?"

"About us."

You replied, stepping closer.

"About what’s happening to us."

Anthony's jaw tightened, and he looked away he was expecting this just not so soon.

"I have duties, responsibilities. I simply cannot afford distractions."

"Duties!"

You repeated bitterly.

"Is that all I am to you? A distraction?"

He didn’t respond immediately, the crackling fire the only sound breaking the tense silence.

You felt a lump forming in your throat, the weight of your emotions pressing down on you.

"I thought we had something real, Anthony,"

You whispered, your voice barely audible.

"I thought our love was strong enough to withstand anything."

His gaze softened momentarily, but then his walls went back up.

"You don’t understand the pressures I’m under. The expectations as Viscount."

"I am your Viscountess Anthony!

You exclaimed towards your shallow husband.

Anthony winced at your tone never hearing or seeing like this in your 7 months of marriage.

So please help me understand."

You pleaded, tears welling up in your eyes.

"Don’t shut me out."

Anthony sighed deeply, running a hand through his hair.

"It is not that simple."

"Why not?"

You muttered, your frustration bubbling over.

"Why can you not let me in? I am your wife, Anthony. I am supposed to be your partner’s

You felt like you were standing on the edge of a precipice, teetering on the brink of an abyss.

"You knew what you were marrying into when you agreed to court me."

He said quietly.

"The Bridgerton name, the responsibilities that come with it."

"I married you, Anthony. Not the title, not the estate. You"

You said, your voice breaking.

"But the man I fell in love with is slipping away, and I don’t know how to reach him."

Anthony's expression softened for a fleeting moment, but it was quickly replaced by a mask of stoicism.

"I have to be strong. For the family. For you."

"Being strong doesn’t mean being distant.”

You countered.

"It doesn’t mean shutting out the people who love you."

He turned away, staring into the flames.

"I don’t know how to be any other way."

Tears streamed down your cheeks as you stepped forward, placing a hand on his arm.

"Then let me help you. Let me in, Anthony. Don’t let us fall apart."

Anthony remained silent, his body tense under your touch.

The fire’s warmth contrasted sharply with the cold distance between you.

You felt a pang of despair, wondering if this was the end of the love story you had cherished so dearly.

"I love you."

You whispered, voice shaking.

"But I cannot and will not do this alone. I need you to fight for us, for what we had."

He finally looked at you, his eyes filled with a mixture of pain and longing.

"I do not want to lose you."

He admitted, his voice hoarse.

"Then don’t," you urged. "Fight for us, Anthony. Let’s face the challenges together, as we promised."

For a moment, it seemed as if he might reach out, might take that step towards reconciliation.

But then the shutters came down again, and he turned away.

"I don’t know if I can."

he said, his voice barely above a whisper.

Your heart ached at his words, but you refused to give up.

Stepping closer, you gently took his hand, your touch soft yet resolute.

"We can, Anthony. We can face anything together."

He looked at you, the conflict in his eyes evident.

"I am scared."

he admitted, his voice cracking.

"Scared of failing you, of not being enough."

"You are enough."

you whispered, squeezing his hand.

"We’re enough. But only if we stand together."

Anthony’s resolve seemed to waver, the walls around his heart beginning to crumble.

Slowly, he reached up and cupped your face in his hands, his touch tender and filled with longing.

"I’ve been so afraid of being vulnerable."

he confessed, his eyes glistening with unshed tears.

"But losing you would be the greatest failure of all."

A tear slipped down your cheek as you leaned into his touch.

"Then let’s stop being afraid. Let’s be strong together."

With a shaky breath, Anthony pulled you into his arms, holding you tightly.

You felt his heart beating against yours, the warmth of his embrace melting away the cold distance that had settled between you.

"I love you."

he murmured into your hair.

"More than anything."

"I love you too."

you replied, your voice filled with hope.

"And I believe in us."

As you stood there, wrapped in each other’s embrace, the weight of your fears and doubts began to lift.

Together, you faced the future with renewed determination, ready to conquer any obstacle that came your way.

Hand in hand, you walked towards the light of a new beginning, leaving the shadows of the past behind.

And as the sun set on the Bridgerton estate, you knew that this time, you would find your way back to each other stronger, wiser, and more in love than ever before.

[divinesolas]

Flowers | The Series | Chapter Eleven | A Challenge

Summary | Jacaerys day just so happens to continue to get worse and worse and worse.

Pairing | Jacaerys Velaryon × Fem!Reader

Warnings | jacaerys pov chapter, sort of a filler one sorry but next update will definitely be more interesting.. not proofread!

Word Count | 2.1k

A/n | LONG TIME NO SEE !! sorry for the super late update guys i should be back to normal posting now!! was down with a terrible case of writers block :(

Series masterlist

everyone within the general vicinity of him could tell jacaerys was in a horrible mood. the maids grimaced and quickly bowed before scurrying away as he walked by. his brother and uncle had left him soon after delivering the news, leaving him to settle down himself. jacaerys has an awful temper, he had to leave his room quickly so as to not pick up a vase and smash it against the wall.

He didn't know why he was so annoyed. maybe he was more embarrassed, he had sent you that rose and now here you were in a courtship with another man. he was humiliated, maybe he should write you an apology.

as he continues to contemplate in his mind his stops quickly in his steps as he almost bumps into, “lady cassandra. I am so sorry.”

she has a sickly sweet smile on her face making him feel a little sick, does she think he cannot tell a real look from a fake one? how does she always seem to know where he was? he feels like he has seen more of her in the past couple days than he’s seen anybody else.

“It is not an issue at all, my prince. I am happy to see you.”

‘I am not happy to see you’ but he shall bite his tongue and place a kind looking smile on his face.

“I am glad to see you as well lady cassandra, I apologize but i am needed elsewhere.”

it's not a lie, he does truly need to be somewhere, though if it was anyone else talking to him he would not be so eager to leave.

there was nothing wrong with cassandra… per say. She was persistent? Whenever he started to drift away mentally from the conversation she always tried to drag him back changing the conversation, whenever some other girl would come she would find a way to drag the two of them down a different path. she came on very strong, though she is not the only one who does but for some odd reason he felt he was seeing way too much of her.

“the training yard, yes? may you accompany me there? I wish to cheer you on today.” How does she know that?

“Of course.” She smiles and eagerly grabs his outstretched arm and he grimaces as he continues his walk to the training yard.

Trying his best to pay attention to what she was talking about the two continue walking towards the training yard, once he arrives at the stairs he has to practically pry her hands off him and rushes down the steps to where he had spotted his brother.

“Lucerys!” his brother turns to him and is almost bugged eyed at the eagerness of his brother, “jace?-”

“Let us go now, i shall see you lady cassandra.” he acts oblivious to her obviously annoyed facial expression as she bows, “till later my prince.”

Lucerys makes some sounds of discomfort as jacaerys drags him further into the training yard, “can you get go you're hurting me?” jacaerys finally gets going with a huff and sighs, a weight seemingly dropping off his shoulder. “What is wrong with you? Are you still upset over the courtship?”

jacaerys groans and turns away from him, “definitely not.”

“Oh he definitely is.”

Jace clicks his tongue as aemond joins the two brothers, “I am certainly not. I just happen to not feel well today.”

It's true, he does not feel well. Not after the news of your courtship, though that is completely irrelevant, he just so happened to start feeling sick after hearing the news. it has nothing to do with the news of your courtship certainly not.

“look at your face it most certainly is bothering you a whole lot oh you are so sad and pathetic.”

jacaerys ignores him, fiddling around with his sword, he should just train for the day, maybe hitting a dummy until it breaks while imagining that fools face will make him feel better. For no reason at all. Definitely not because he is upset over you.

Lost in thought his eyes drift towards the peers surrounding the courtyard. The duel happening a couple feet away from him bores him. His eyes lead upwards and he feels a warmth crash over him. A smile greets his face before he is able to stop it. He for a moment felt as though he was imagining things, you had shown up and he couldn't believe it. You bowed and sent him a smile. He swears he's never seen something so beautiful, the smile on his face can't help but grow. He hopes you are as happy to see him as he is to see you.

“Are you even listening to me?” Luke must have been speaking but jace hasn't caught a word of it. It had only made sense to him once he turned around fully and spotted you. He sent you a wave before whispering to Jace, “You really are a love sick fool.”

Jace angrily turns towards his brother an angry look as replaced his once cheerful one, “you shut your mouth.”

Jace decides he’ll go choose a different weapon from the wall as an excuse to walk away from his brother. He ends up stealing one more glance at you. You have an amused look on your face and he finds himself relaxing just a bit.

His mood however quickly falls just as fast as it has risen when he noticed ser joffrey had joined the courtyard. Now it had made sense you were at the courtyard to watch him train.

He grows more and more annoyed as he watches the exchange between you to. He eyes Joffrey down, it would not be hard for him to swap places with him, he should be the one making you smile like that. Why does he look so happy?

Not even watching his brother and aemond spare can draw him from his flights. Though that may be because it is well obvious to everyone aemond will win the fight.

“Good day to you my prince.”

As if his day could not get any worse, the last person he wishes to speak to is now standing by his side.

He clenches his jaw and tilts his head for a moment before answering him.

“Good day to you to ser joffrey.”

He turns to face him and somehow grows even more annoyed by the smile joffrey has on his face.

“What a good fight.”

Jace turns back to look at the fight for a moment and fights the urge to roll his eyes as he watches aemond play with lucerys like a dog.

“Yes, certainly.”

The two stand still for a moment before Joffrey continues to speak.

“You seem to have a good eye, my prince.”

“Whatever do you mean.”

Joffrey laughs, “well not only in fights my prince but in women.”

Jacerys finds himself frozen for a moment, “whatever are you implying ser?”

Joffrey laughs once more and the smile on his face seems way too sweet to be anything real.

“You must take me for a fool, my prince if you believe I do not notice. If you believe anyone in the red keep does not notice.”

Jacaerys grows angry, though he knows exactly what joffrey means he finds himself rather annoyed at his words.

“I have not the faintest idea of what you are implying ser.”

Joffrey's smile only grows as he shakes his head, “if you wish to continue to live in denial then so be it but i'd like to make a proposition with you my prince.”

“What could you want?” jacaerys says before he can catch himself and Joffrey continues to laugh. “Ah so i've truly angered you my prince your mask seems to be slipping my apologies.”

“Spit it out.” jacaerys cannot believe himself right now he has never shown such disrespect to anybody. He is beginning to feel a little like Aegon and he does not rather like that.

“I wish you to stop in your affections for miss dunn.”

Jacaerys stiffens and he finds an unexplainable pit growing in his stomach. Not even the fight ending between luce and aemond can distract him enough. Did his eye just twitch? He finds his next words harder to say, as if there is a hand inside his mouth gripping his tongue to make him not speak.

“I, um, I do not hold any affection for Miss dunn. That is um, an unexpected accusation.”

“You are a terrible liar.”

He finds himself at a loss for words as Joffrey points his sword at Jace, catching the attention of everyone in the courtyard. He can hear some gasps and some chatter but the only thing he can focus on is joffrey. “Let us duel.”

Jacaerys is at a loss for words. Why does he so suddenly want to duel? Before he can even think his hand finds his sword and he catches himself agreeing. He must be blind with rage and for what. There's no way he should be losing his cool over you. Certainly not. Definitely not.

He feels as though all Joffrey is trying to do is make a mockery of him, especially as he watches Joffrey turn to you and bow. He clenches his jaw growing more irritated.

He does not even steal a glance at you, he finds himself unable to.

He had lost. And jacaerys swears he had never felt so humiliated in his life. The crowd around him cheers yet all he can do is drag himself to where his brother is standing who attempts to comfort him yet the words fall on deaf ears. You had seen him lose. You must think terribly of him now. You must be so wowed by Joffrey that you would say yes if he asked to marry you right then and there. He was going to be sick.

“Everyone loses fights brother it is alright.”

“I am humiliated.”

“You are the crowned prince, nobody is going to make fun of you.”

The two do not exchange any more words. Jacaery is confused by the smile that suddenly appears on his face, before he gets the chance luce is already moving to leave.

“My lady.”

A moment passes before he is greeted with the sweet melody of your voice, “my prince.”

Still humiliated from today's loss he believes it may be better for him to run away. Though a part of him tells him that will only be more embarrassing.

He turns to face you, ““My lady… I um. i uh hope you are well today.” and of course he stumbles and stammers his words this day just continued to get worse.

“I am well today, your grace. The duel was brilliant… I think.” he finds your weak attempt at comforting him only stabbing the knife he feels he has in his chest deeper. “I wish I could say I agree with my lady.”

He cannot even lift his head to look at you. Maybe Joffrey had been correct. He should stop with whatever foolish comfort he sought from you and leave you to fall in love with joffrey. Now he is really going to be sick. He must leave, for the first time in a long time he feels like he should curl up into a ball and cry.

“I must go, I hope to see you-”

He is frozen once he feels the grasp of your hand around his wrist. The only thing now on his mind is how warm your hand feels. “My lady…”

His mind is racing as he realizes you had done it out of instinct, you did not want him to walk away then and a sudden wave of hope crashes into him like a wave hits the shore.

“You fought well today, my prince, I hope to see you duel once more.”

Those are certainly not the words he had hoped to hear from you then but none of that mattered when he felt you grip him tighter before you had let you. A part of him watched to reach his hand out and grab your hand but he had used any remaining self control he had to stop himself. A smile dawns on his face, a real smile for the first time that day.

“It is no issue my lady, I am glad. You shall see more of me, I promise. good day my lady.”

He makes this vow not only to you but to himself. It suddenly did not matter to him you were in a courtship already.

“Good day my prince, I hope you keep to your word.” he can barely believe it, the smile dawning his face only grows as he quickly turns in the hopes you will not notice the flush that finds its way to his face. You now made it clear you also wished to see him more and who was he to deny you.

---

did not include the taglist as its been way too long and im sure no one who had been reading this is still interested 😭😭 if you still are please feel free to ask to be added !!

[starkskeep]

But if you hold me without hurting me (r. stark)

But if you hold me without hurting me r. stark imagine

Pt. 5 of Oh, all I used to do was pray, Right when I felt the moment stop, And I might be ok, but I'm not fine at all, And the life I gave away

Pairings - Robb Stark x female!Reader

Summary - You have a long-awaited conversation with Robb. It changes things between the two of you.

Word Count - 1,133 words

Warnings - Angst, Possibly unbearable cheesiness

A/N - I broke the Taylor Swift title streak. In my defense, I have been a LDR stan since middle school and Cinnamon Girl makes me sob every time I listen to it.

Songs I listened to while writing: Like Real People Do (Hozier), Cinnamon Girl, Carmen (Lana Del Rey), Me and My Husband (Mitski)

Robb feels his heart start to beat erratically as he watches you and Jon. It is obvious that you care deeply about Jon as he does you. Robb knows that he has walked in on something private, feeling jealous but also wishing that he could be the one to comfort you as such. Your moment with Jon is interrupted when Robb clears his throat in order to make you aware of his entrance into your chambers. The sound startles you and causes you to turn in Robb’s direction. Jon also turns to look at Robb, his expression wary that Robb would misinterpret the scene.

Robb begins to speak slowly but his voice cracks ever so slightly, his heart contracting in his chest due to an onslaught of emotions. “Am I interrupting anything?”

You quickly regain your composure. “No, my lord husband, you are not. I lost a letter earlier today. Jon has calmed me down and agreed to help look for it.” You dismiss Jon from your chambers, assuring him that you will be okay. 

Jon locks eyes with Robb as he leaves. Tensions eased between him and Robb once he saw Robb trying to fix everything. However, Jon still continues to be an advocate for you. His brother looks back at him, eyes filled with questions he knows Jon cannot answer. Robb just needs to know that you are going to be okay, regardless of what happened. 

Your husband takes a step closer to you. He looks into your eyes, searching for the pain that he knows must be there. You are a strong woman but no one should be subjected to the kind of abuse that the letter contained. As he moves closer, you notice the letter crumpled in Robb’s fist. “Ah. It seems as I I do not need to search for the letter.” You say with a sad smile, “I take it that you have seen what my father thinks of me?”

Looking down at the letter once again, Robb scowls. The fury that had been burning inside of him returns to the surface. His head shakes in disgust and he quickly closes his fist tighter around the letter, as if the action would make the item disappear from existence. Robb nods once in acknowledgment of her question. “I did. It is nothing less than disgraceful.” He draws his eyes up to meet yours. Robb’s voice shakes with thinly veiled anger. “Your father is a cruel, cruel man. To say such things to you, his own daughter…well, it is unforgivable.” He says the last word through gritted teeth.

You motion for Robb to sit next to you. In your almost year of marriage, this is the first time that you have actually asked him to be near you. It seems as if he has realized this fact as well if his hesitancy is anything to go off of. Robb’s nervous movements are in stark contrast to your controlled stillness. A couple moments pass between you two before you begin to talk. Long-awaited and much-needed words begin this conversation. “It’s cruel but what he says is true. I have failed in my duty as a wife. I should have given you an heir by now.” 

Completely stunned is how the maesters would describe Robb if they were here to record this meeting. You are still calling him your husband, even after everything he has done, but you are voicing something that Robb would never want to believe. Yes, it is a wife’s and therefore your duty to give him an heir, but he would never, never force you to conceive if you were not yet ready. He turns to face the fireplace, staring into the flickering flames as he realizes how truly damaged you have been from a childhood in the Frey household and the months as his wife. Both of you have tried to do everything that has been expected of you, yet it is you who has suffered the most and continues to endure. Robb is angry at the world. Angry at the cruel words of your father. Angry at himself for the way he has treated you. Sighing deeply, he speaks after gathering his emotions. “Do not let them make you believe that this is your fault. It takes two to make a child. I am just as much to blame for the situation we find ourselves in…” 

Robb’s words trail off when he feels you place your head on his shoulder. It seems to be a night of firsts. Much like you never asked him to be near you, you have never initiated any sort of physical comfort. You both enjoy the feeling until you bring Robb back to reality with your voice breaking the silence. “I don’t blame you for anything. I want you to know that. You were forced to marry me, forced to make me your queen, while you still loved Talisa. Why would you want to leave her side for a Frey, especially when Talisa was carrying your child? I ruined your life.”

Feeling a tear soak into the shoulder of his tunic, Robb tilts your head up so he can see you clearly. “You didn’t ruin my life. I made a deal with your father. I knew what I was agreeing to when I crossed the bridge.” He reaches his thumb to brush the tears off your face. “This is not your burden to bear. It is something we must share. Something we must work through so that we can grow together. Something I should have worked harder on at the beginning of our marriage.” Your husband sighs deeply and shakes his head, trying to accept how much he has just spoken. Robb comes to the startling realization that he has never voiced this sentiment to you before, much less even admitted it to himself. 

“Thank you. I need to hear those words said to me.” You say and place a gentle kiss on Robb’s cheek. A blush spreads across your face as you do so.

He freezes when he feels your lips brush against his skin. A matching pink tint blotches his cheeks like yours did. This is the first time you have shown affection for him and it feels…good. Robb smiles and leans over to place a kiss on your forehead, wanting to continue this newfound physical affection that you have started. “I’m here for you. I know I haven’t been in the past, but from this moment forward, I will always be here for you my queen.” The increased presence of his Northern accent betrays the emotions that are overwhelming him. Staring into your eyes, his gaze reveals nothing but honesty and sincerity in his gaze. Robb meant every word he said to you tonight. 

A/N - Once again, thank you so much for reading. My ask box is always open for requests, comments, or if just want to gush about our lovely Stark boys.

[linonyang]

BF!SKZ WHEN YOU ARE IN STUDY MODE [hyung line]

read maknae line version here

pairings: hyung line x gender-neutral!reader (written separately per member)

genre: fluff, very light angst, college au

warning: mentions of food and insects

word count: 1.6k words (390-400 words per member)

tag list: @awooghan​​ @hwangsify​​ @xiaoderrrr​ @cosmic-railwayxo​​​

note: i impulsively wrote this since i am on the brink of getting insane bc of this one project i have... so don’t mind me /hj i’ll probably write the second part/maknae line next week when i am done with the mentioned project lol i hope you enjoy this short hc!

© linonyang - all rights reserved. please do not copy, translate, modify, repost, or claim as yours.

☆ CHAN

since he’s a guy who loves to stay awake all night, it’s no problem for him to join your cramming and procrastinating in projects and exams!

if not, he might be the little devil on your shoulder to stay awake with him, instead of the other way around (which was the original plan) :p 

he’ll do everything to not make your eyes close in the study hall!!!

if you’re into coffee, he’ll bring you a cup of coffee of the biggest size from your favorite cafe nearby

or if you’re feeling like eating something sweet to spike up your sugar a little bit, he might buy all of your favorite candies and desserts (including your favorite cakes and pastries) in small portions

so you can have a little bit of everything :>

chan will instantly embrace you if you’re on the brink of breaking down

you can cry on his shoulder (literally) and have him as your pillow whenever you want to give yourself short breaks after long hours of studying

and he’ll never tell this to you: he really enjoys you staying beside him when you guys do your own things

he just finds it comforting‌…

he loves how you don’t feel bothered when there’s someone beside you (him) when you usually prefer to study alone on a normal day

it’s like he’s an exception, he really loves the idea of it :* he loves to joke that you’re so down bad for him! (let’s be real, he’s not lying </3)

so you don’t have to stress out all on your own, chan’s there with you to feel less pressured and worried about your incoming exams and deadlines!

when chan notices that trouble is slowly surfacing on your face, he’ll talk to you a bit to lower your anxiety

he really doesn’t want you to feel very stressed!!!! he hates seeing any negative expression on your face!!!

he’ll feel sad too when you feel sad :((( 

being the knight in shining armor, as usual, he’s willing to bring you home whenever you feel like doing so <3

(and you can’t stop him from doing that, he wouldn’t be able to sleep at night without knowing that you arrived safely at your home or dormitory!)

chan will definitely send a message that you should not extend your studying at home because you did a lot already when you were with him!

☆ MINHO

minho will probably do everything to make you consider studying in his home

so you can not drown in instant food and fast food and have delicious meals cooked by him from time to time instead <33

also, his cats!!!!!!!

he’ll probably bring soonie, doongie, and dori near you so you can have some comfort whenever he’s not in the room with you, whenever he has to cook, take a shower, and all that jazz

and the three cats seem to make your day every time

it’s like minho communicated with them beforehand about how can you study healthily

when you’re sitting and reading the papers on the desk for too long, one cat will block your way and sit on the papers and books

then another will jump on your lap and ask for your love and affection (just begging you to pet them :D)

and one will constantly meow behind you, already on the bed, so you can take a good nap

when you do get to nap with all of minho’s cats on his bed, he always arrives at the wrong time, apparently

you’re asleep! but he cannot help but feel butterflies in his stomach because you look so cute napping with his beloved kitties :’>

as you instructed him before, he’ll wake you up once you reach your time limit

then he’ll join you to study once you’re back at his desk! :D

minho will definitely pet the cats beside you when you’re endlessly typing on your laptop

just so he can look after you because he does not want you to lose track of his so-called “healthy study session” for you

he’ll definitely scold you when he’ll hear your stomach growling in the middle of the night

because “how can you study with no source of energy?!?!”

he always reminds you to not overwork and don’t pass your limits

when you want to take a longer snooze (especially when it shows from your constant yawning and eye rubbing), he will not hesitate to bring all of your materials to the couch outside of his room

and drag you to his bed!!!!! so he can cuddle you all night and whisper all of his manifestations for your good results in school!!! he believes you will ace the exam, and you did so perfectly in all of your tasks!!!

☆ CHANGBIN

this guy…

oh when you ask him to accompany you to the library

he’ll drop all of his things and find you in an instant!

changbin will take your studies seriously as if he’s the one studying :p 

a strict but loving kinda person

he’ll not hesitate to scold you if he sees you sidetracking! lmao </3

but he wouldn’t do that when he knows you’re taking a break

when you feel a little disoriented or frustrated, changbin will give you energy with his powerful hugs!

“my hugs are proven to give you a better mood and more motivation to do whatever you want!!!”

“what if i don’t want to study anymore?”

“that is not included, alright?!”

(he didn’t lie about his hugs making you feel better and energetic again tho ;D there was an immediate effect right when he hugged you tightly for a solid minute)

he does serve as a distraction sometimes because he will lovingly stare at you when he’s at the peak of feeling bored

but when he is dealing with something, changbin will unintentionally bother you by making noises

in conclusion, he gives you a realistic feel of what being a student is

it makes you reassured‌… that how you’re facing academics is considerably normal?

even if changbin did promise you he’ll make sure you’re doing well, it seems like he’s the one who needs some guidance

when he’s aware that he’s not tracking you that frequently anymore, he stops what he’s doing and goes back to staring at you with heart eyes

“how are you doing?” and some good sliding of his water jug on the table to you because you can’t be dehydrated!

he steals your notebook of reminders and asks you if any of the pending deadlines and exams listed should be crossed out already

changbin will drag you out of the library when you have crossed enough pending tasks in your notebook! and take you on a scrumptious dinner date because he knows you deserve it for all the work you’ve done :>

will always pay for your dinner, even if you’re willing to pay

and will probably baby you when he discovers you finished all of your work

“aww let’s order another plate of that food we ordered! you need more good food after that exhausting study time!”

“but my stomach is full already, binnie </3”

☆ HYUNJIN

hyunjin is one worried baby when you tell him you’re in “super study mode”

you refuse to believe that your boyfriend is behaving like a mother

he will visit you and shower you with so much love

it’s like… he wants to lessen your worries :’<

he is willing to do all the chores so you can study without interruptions!!! 

he is also willing to feed you so you don’t have to get out of your seat!!!

hyunjin will always be on the go when you need something

his hugs and kisses? he will drag you to your bed and give you some!

his words of encouragement? he has prepared a long list in his head to give you more determination to finish your work!

will never get out of mom mode until you’re done

whenever you update him on your progress, he always congratulates you as if you won a life-changing award

“i am so proud of you!! :DDD” and clapping loudly

that’s because he knows how grueling studying is, and you should be congratulated for being hardworking

he loves to see you snort and laugh at his antics, even if they’re very exaggerated

and he moves and acts exaggeratingly just so you don’t have any direct source of the negative atmosphere

when he notices that you’re slowly sighing heavier than the previous one, he rushes to your side and looks after you literally

he will endlessly peck your face and stroke your hands with his thumbs

“you are doing so well! don’t say that you barely did anything today! you did so much already and i saw all of it!”

if hyunjin thinks you’ve done so much already, he’ll tell you to stop and invite you to take a walk outside with him

it’s a win-win situation because you get to relax by looking at the view of the park and hyunjin can capture beautiful photos and find inspiration for his paintings :DDD 

plus, that’s the perfect time for hyunjin to lighten up your mood

“i already washed your toilet btw, i saw a cockroach walk towards me while i was scrubbing! ugh, worst experience ever!”

“what did you do?”

“i hit it with a toilet scrubber too lightly, it was still alive so i ran out of the bathroom for a bit :’D heh”

“where the cockroach went to then?!?! i don’t want cockroaches in my home?!”

[animasola86]

News travels fast in Hogwarts - Option 1

Notes: This is one of the options you have at the end of this oneshot:

Pairing: Aesop Sharp x f!reader Genre: Angst/Fluff // Words: 1k // [READ ON AO3]

Synopsis: After a very confusing dream (or was it?), you wake up in the arms of this grumpy old man.

WARNINGS: Established student/teacher relationship.

Your heart was still thundering inside your chest, that dream, if it was one, clinging to you as if you'd taken a plunge into the Black Lake fully clothed. The room was dark, and you felt around until your hand found the arm draped around your torso, holding you in a tight embrace, pressed against a warm chest.

Breathing was easier again, and you slowly rolled under the arm to face the person behind you. A calm face came into view, deep creases etched into weathered skin. Eyes closed, lips a thin line, he was breathing softly, a deep rumble that soothed you. Your hand moved up to trace the ragged lines of his scar, and you clenched your jaw when a sudden sadness gripped your heart.

“What's wrong, sweetheart?” your Potions teacher and lover of at least two months now whispered in his gruff, hoarse voice, his dark, hooded eyes scanning your face. The back of his fingers wiped at your cheek, and you realized you had been crying.

You leaned into his touch and closed your eyes. “Nothing,” you said quietly, licking your lips, tasting salt. “Just a... dream,” you added, still not sure it had been one. It had felt so real, all those emotions, the fear of losing him, but also the longing for... someone else. Sighing deeply, you snuggled against him, and he held you closer.

“Do you want to talk about it?” he asked quietly.

“I... don't know,” you whispered back, your fingers fidgeting with the buttons of his pyjama top. “It just... left me so confused and... scared...”

“Scared?”

You looked up slowly, meeting his dark gaze. Shifting against him, you put your hand under your head and faced him properly. “Scared of losing you,” you then said in a breathy whisper.

His expression softened, his hand cupping your cheek gently. “What makes you think you'll lose me?”

Biting your lip, you watched him in the semi-darkness of the room, his face so familiar and yet still somewhat intimidating. “You're my teacher...”

He raised an eyebrow, a strange twinkle in his eyes. “And you've noticed that only now?” he replied teasingly.

You scoffed, a smirk playing around the corner of your mouth. “You know what I mean...”

“I do,” he said gravelly. “And I understand your fear. I am fully aware of the nature of our relationship, darling.”

“But you're not afraid? Afraid that it might be found out? That we'll have to face the consequences? That it'll be over?”

“Those are things we cannot control,” he replied quietly. “We can only do so much, remain secretive about it, keep it to ourselves, and so far it worked just fine, didn't it?” His hand slipped deeper into your hair, while his thumb traced the lines of your scar. “I wish I could do this in public, for everyone to see, trust me, I really wish I could, but I've accepted that we shouldn't, for both of our sakes. As much as I want to indulge you, I do not want to lose my job or be responsible for your expulsion. But I'm not afraid,” he added with a small smile. “I'm enjoying this for as long as I am able...”

His deep voice rumbled through you, somewhat calming your nerves. But you just couldn't shake that strange feeling settling in your guts. “What if people talk? What if they... spread rumours about us?” you whispered, biting your lip.

He sighed and pressed his thumb against your bottom lip, keeping you from chewing on it more. “There will always be rumours, and you shouldn't pay them any mind. No matter how close to the truth they might get...”

“Why are you so calm about this?” you wondered.

“Years and years of experience. I've stopped caring a long time ago...”

“About rumours, right?” you asked, suddenly a little self-conscious.

He chuckled. “Yes, about what anyone might say about me. But I do care about you,” he added and leaned in a little, his nose brushing against yours. “And if you're afraid people might talk, we can try to be even more discreet.”

You sighed, a small pout on your lips. “No more... after class visits? No more... special moments in your office?”

“Exactly,” he said gravelly before he tilted his head and pressed his lips to yours, kissing the pout away. “As tough as it might be...”

You growled against his lips, gave him a peck and leaned back with a loud exhale. “But I'm still allowed to spend the night here?”

“You're allowed anything you're comfortable with, sweetheart,” he whispered, closing his eyes as he leaned into his pillow and sighed contently, sleep washing over his worn face.

You watched him for a moment. Whenever he talked like that, you considered throwing caution to the wind and just indulge in all your dirty, little fantasies, no matter who might be seeing you. But if that dream had shown you anything, it was that you should indeed be more careful, if you wanted to continue this forbidden love affair.

And you wanted nothing more than to spend all your waking hours with this incredible man next to you, in his arms, or just in his presence, talking to him, listening to his stories, studying with him, being close to him, very close to him, – all of it brought you great joy.

But that blasted dream had brought something else to the surface that you had thought you'd be over by now. Another Slytherin with dark eyes who had been able to turn your world upside down. Groaning quietly, you snuggled against the very real chest in front of you, a strong arm pulling you closer, and you fell asleep again, hoping you'd wake up better rested next time you came to.

End notes: So it was just a dream, huh? Are you sure?

Go to option 2 if you want to see another outcome. How will she wake up next?

Original Post - Option 2

[ MASTERLIST ] [ AO3 ]

[jokertrap-ran]

BAD MEDICINE ~Infectious teachers~ [PC GAME] Kashu Remu (Chemistry) Route Translations (Bad END)

MC’s name is retained as the original MC name Kawana Hina.

* Words within ' ' are spoken in English – *Spoiler free : Translations under cut! *T/N: Fair warning: It's pretty messed up. Angst, anyone?

Prologue / Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 / Part 7 / Part 8 / Part 9 / Part 10 / Part 11 / Part 12 / Part 13 / Part 14 / Part 15 / Part 16 / Part 17 / Bad END

— Shortly after that… He’s brought me to a place. A forest far out from the city.   It was deserted, of course. A place shaded by the trees… A place where the sun couldn’t really reach.   That was where he brought me to.

———————————————

Hina: Um… Sensei? Where are we going?

Kashu: It’s just up ahead.

Kashu: …

Hina: (What should I do now? Would talking help?)

Hina: Um… It’s getting dark outside.

Kashu: …

Hina: S-Sensei? Can I ask you something?

Kashu: What?

Hina: What are you planning on doing in a place like this…?

Kashu: I wonder?

Hina: Oh, are you going to conduct an experiment, perhaps?

Kashu: Perhaps.

Hina: Erm… Kashu-sensei?

Kashu: …You’re being awfully noisy.

Kashu: If you really want to know, then let me show you!

Hina: Wha-!?

Hina: (Huh…!?)

Kashu: …

Hina: Sensei…?

Kashu: Shut up…

Hina: Let… me…

Kashu: Shut up, shut up, SHUT UP!

Hina: Pl… ea… se…

Hina: (Is he mad with me? Why? Is that why he’s strangling me?)

Hina: (But if he’s truly that mad, then does he look like he’s about to cry?)

Hina: (…Why? I have so many things I want to ask him, but why is my voice not working?)

Hina: Wh… y…?

Kashu: …

Hina: Wou… ld… you…

Kashu: I would like to know too. Why would I?

Kashu: I don’t know, because I can’t understand it either. I just get so irritated whenever I see you.

Hina: Urk…

Kashu: It never got better. No matter how much time passed. Even if I never saw you. And it only made me angrier.

Kashu: But, seeing you also frustrated me. It felt almost as if my heart was being forced to waver.

Kashu: It hurt, it stung, and it made it hard to breathe.

Kashu: I just had to forget about you, didn’t I? But I couldn’t get my mind off you no matter how hard I tried.

Kashu: I wanted to keep my focus on my experiments, but thoughts about you always got in the way. It’s a real nuisance.

Kashu: This reaction of mine is foreign. It disgusts me. And I cannot keep on living like this.

Kashu: So, in order to treat this affliction of mine… It seems like I’ll simply have to rid this world of your existence.

Hina: …Ngh…

———————————————

Kashu: So, disappear. Please, go away. I’m begging you.

Kashu: I can’t stand suffering like this anymore.

Kashu: It’s much better being alone in this world!

Kashu: Hey, won’t you return me to how I usually am? You’re the one who made me like this. So, tell me. Will I go back to how I was?

Kashu: If I can’t, then tell me. How can I free myself from this frustration I feel?

Kashu: Do I have to delete you from this plane of existence after all? Tell me… TELL ME!

Hina: (…Huh. So that was what was bothering him.)

Hina: (He’s a teacher, yet it’s almost as if he’s still a child. One that’s throwing a tantrum to his parents because he’s unable to express his feelings properly.)

Hina: (But, I guess that checks out. This is the first time he’s starting to have feelings for someone else, so I suppose it’s the same thing to him.)

Hina: …

Kashu: …!?

Hina: (I can no longer speak, but…)

Hina: (There may be something else I can do to put him at ease.)

Hina: (Just a little more… Move, hand. Work with me a little… A little while… Just enough to embrace him. That's all I ask for.) 

Kashu: Why…?

Hina: Ha… a…

Kashu: Why…? WHY!?

Hina: (Don't cry. You'll get over it eventually.)

Hina: (It's alright even if it hurts. Because… you're not alone.)

Hina: (So don't go saying such sad things like how you're better off alone…)

———————————————

In reality, I'd wanted to convey this to you through words.  But, I couldn’t.　

———————————————

Kashu: …

Kashu: …Heh.

Kashu: …Ahh. Now, I am finally free.

Kashu: I can focus on my experiments, and nothing else, just as I did before.

Kashu: Right? …Right?

———————————————

Kashu: Why… Why do I still…

Kashu: I should have been freed now that you're gone, but why does it still…

Kashu: …Why…?

Kashu: Hey… What should I do about this? Tell me… what should I do…?

Kashu: ANSWER ME!

Kashu: Someone… Anyone…

Kashu: Please…

Kashu: Save me…

[amberskyyking]

Great news Tech fam, its Bad Batch Day and I am still on my bullshit with no end in sight, so welcome to another installment of This Isn’t Over Till I Fucking Say So, our man is alive and loved and coming home and canon cannot stop meeee!!!!!!! 😈

Implications Of Being Alive

Chapter 6: Is This The Real Life (Is This Just Fantasy)?

***CW: Talk of decom/death, dehumanization, and past medical trauma***

CX-2 activated… or… or perhaps Tech awoke.

Because Echo was still here, still holding its hand, even. It distinctly remembered asking Echo to stay with him, and Echo had responded Of course, vod. Right now there’s nowhere else I’d rather be, exactly.

He had kept his word.

Omega was here again, too, just like Echo had said she would be. He could barely make out the bright yellow of her jacket and tuft of blonde hair without corrective eye lenses of some sort, but the soft snoring sounds from nearby alerted him to her presence, and when he squinted, he could tell it was her, slouched over in a chair with her mouth hanging open.

Tech must have woken up, which meant it was dreaming again. Not that it particularly minded. That meant it hadn’t been decommissioned yet. Besides, it had never been able to stop the dreams before, but they had usually been pleasant. It was still registering some residual pain, but it suspected that if it woke, that particular issue would become significantly more apparent.

For now, it would accept the glitches. They were allowing it him to see his family one last time, which was more than he deserved.

“Well, look who’s up,” Echo muttered softly. “How are you feeling, Tech?”

Tech considered the question a moment before responding.

“Improved,” he settled on. What lingering pain he was still experiencing paled in comparison to anything he had been subjected to earlier, though he couldn’t say that it was completely gone.

“That’s good to hear,” Echo replied with a warm grin. “You should be in a lot better shape now. Not every medic knows how to work with biomechanics, but I happen to know of a few good ones myself. We got you a few upgrades. Couple of your servos were fried and your prosthetic arm was practically slag after that explosion. Omega got some good hits in on you too, but they weren’t lethal. Thank the maker she was holding back,” He muttered the last part under his breath.

“I would have to agree,” Tech said, glancing back over to her sleeping form in the chair. Omega had shown significant improvement in form and strategy in their fight since he had seen her last. It was obvious that his brothers had continued her training, and with his own degrading body and mechanics, it seemed unlikely now that he could truly match her. “I would rather not be dead.”

Echo grinned a little at that, though something sad flickered behind his eyes as he did. “Yeah… We prefer you not dead too, vod.”

Tech wasn’t sure what to make of Echo’s expression, but he nodded, moving an arm to prop himself up a bit better but quickly became aware of something strange. The arm felt different. Despite Echo’s claims of his arm being practically slag, it was fully functional, but not at all familiar.

“Ah… We had to completely replaced that,” Echo said softly, noticing his apparent confusion. “Even if the old one wasn’t destroyed, it was pretty outdated. Then again, I’m one to talk.” He spun his scomp a couple times, making a small whirring sound with it, and chuckled softly. “It’s a good model though, I made sure of it. Comfortable interfacing. Customizable, too. I… Figure you’ll want to make some adjustments of your own, once we have you out of here.”

“That would be ideal,” Tech replied, lifting the new prosthetic close to his eyes to examine it. There were modifications he had made to his old one that would likely be missed, however, many of those had been due to necessity in order to prolong function. If this arm worked as intended already, duplicating what extra features he was missing wouldn’t take much effort. Perhaps there would even be room to install some experimental ones.

A sharp inhale from the corner chair pulled his attention from the arm and he twisted eagerly in the bed to face Omega.

“Mmm awake,” Omega yawned, blinking rapidly as she jerked upright in the chair. “Wha’d I miss, I… Tech!”

Tech gave her a small smile and a nod. “Hello, Omega.”

“How are you now?” She asked in a voice full of concern, practically tripping over herself to cross the room to his bedside. “Are you still hurting or is it better?”

“My pain levels have decreased significantly.”

“How’s the arm?”

“It will suffice. It merely needs some modifications to achieve maximum functionality. Nothing I cannot handle.”

“How’s your head?”

“I-”

“Slow down there, Omega,” Echo said soothingly. “Let’s not overwhelm him just yet.”

Omega nodded curtly and met Tech’s eyes. “Sorry.”

“No apology is needed,” Tech said wryly. “It is natural to be curious…”

But he trailed off as he spoke the words. Even for a dream, that was certainly not an approved sentiment. Then again, neither was cohorting with rebel insurgents, or wishing to postpone its own decommissioning. Tech’s brow furrowed in thought.

“I’m glad you still feel that way,” Echo said with just a hint of suspicion. “I… We… Do need to ask you a few, uh… Sensitive questions. We can take it slow, as long as you answer honestly.”

Tech hesitated a moment, but nodded.

“Alright,” Echo said uncomfortably. “We’re really glad to have you back, vod, but… You were clearly sent by the Empire to stop us. Probably to kill us. Including Omega,” Echo gestured to the girl with his scomp. “We need to know why.”

“And you can tell us, Tech,” Omega said earnestly. “It’s okay. We won’t judge you, and we aren’t going to let them hurt you anymore.”

Tech nodded cooperatively. There wasn’t any harm in telling them, considering none of this was even real, though he knew better to believe Omega’s promise that somehow these figments of his imagination could save him. “My orders were to locate and eliminate the rebels completing a munitions transfer on Terova led by Hera Syndulla or be terminated in the attempt,” He recited. “I… Failed. On both counts, apparently.”

“Good,” Echo said, his eyes flashing before he visibly attempted to calm himself.

Shock flickered on Omega’s face. “Yeah… They should never have asked that of you Tech, that’s… That’s wrong. But we weren’t even transferring munitions,” She said crossly. “It was relief aid. Just rations, and most of it was for refugees…”

“That… is not what my intel reported,” Tech mused.

“Well. That’s not surprising,” Echo said. “So they ordered you to kill a bunch of relief workers or die trying?”

“That is what I said,” Tech stated. Although, he had to admit, at least to himself, that when Echo put it that way, it did sound… Disturbing. Calling it as such may be considered treason, but at the least, the mission had been an ineffective use of available resources. Not that it was CX-2’s place to decide that or have an opinion on the matter. Colonel Bragg had to have her reasons.

“Then what is stopping you from trying to finish the job now?” Echo asked darkly.

Tech blinked up at him a couple of times, then at Omega, who seemed to be holding her breath. He shook head. There was nothing for them to worry about, not here.

“The mission is a failure,” Tech repeated himself. “I will be decommissioned shortly.”

“You won’t,” Echo said firmly, but Tech shook his head.

“It is, sadly, standard procedure. My tracker cannot be removed. When they locate my body, if it is still… Functioning,” He chose the word carefully, it was important to be accurate when articulating these sorts of things to avoid unnecessary confusion, “I will be-”

“They won’t find you,” Echo snarled, his face contorting into something dark and vicious, giving Tech pause. “Hemlock may have designed it so removing that thing would kill you, but I made damn sure that the Empire can’t use it to find you anymore. You’re safe, Tech.” He let out a short breathy sigh and ran a hand over his bald head. When he spoke next his voice sounded softer and a little bit choked. “I told you, we’re not letting them take you back. Ever. And I’m sorry we ever let them get to you in the first place…”

Omega put a gentle hand on Echo’s back as he took a moment, covering his eyes with his hand. “Is… Is that all?” She asked hopefully. “The orders are gone so you’re just… you… again?”

Tech looked between the pair of them in confusion and concern. “I… Do not believe it is that simple… Or particularly relevant, here.”

“He’s not the only one they’ve turned against us, ‘Mega,” Echo muttered. “He’s right… It’s never that simple.”

“We’ll figure it out together then,” Omega said firmly. “You’re not alone anymore, Tech.”

That… would be nice.

But it wasn’t really true, was it?

“Tech?” Omega said his name again quietly.

Tech raised his eyes to meet hers. They were golden and sparkling and lifelike, just like in his malfunctions memories, but… That’s all this was. It was all just memories, fragments of his past manifesting themselves with whatever synapses were still firing in its brain and sending it these strange signals, creating the comfortable medical room and the advanced new prosthetic arm and dulling its pain. Omega and Echo acted so much like themselves because that’s how it knew them, that’s how he recognized them, but it wasn’t them.

They weren’t here. He was still alone. And he it shouldn’t care about such things anyways, it wasn’t allowed to, it wasn’t really alive and it would be dead soon anyways so what did any of this matter?!

The realization shouldn’t make a lump form in its throat or the heart monitor go off either. It squinted its eyes shut and shrank back into the bed as the noise pulsed maddeningly overhead, willing it all to just go away.

“Easy there Tech,” It heard Echo’s voice from overhead, and the same as last time it felt a hand slip into its own as if to draw it back, but a sharp jolt cut through his insides as he did. Whatever they were looking for in him, their effort was wasted. There was nothing of him for them to fight for. Everything it used to be back when it had a family and a purpose had been scooped out and shredded, there was just a hole in its psyche where the malfunctions that remained could reverberate off empty walls, taunting it, like they were now. Its actions proved as much. If that family even still lived after years of opposing the Empire, if they ever saw what their brother had truly become, they would want nothing to do with it. Those people had been good and kind. They had fought for each other, taken difficult stances against impossible odds, been loyal to one another, held up situations to a set of morals rather than simply to orders and taken action to protect the innocent and vulnerable from exploiters throughout the galaxy, even when they themselves had struggled to survive.

And CX-2… CX-2 hadn’t been that way for ten years.

It had been helping to build the very Empire that imprisoned and tested on the Clone Troopers who won it the war. It had hunted down insurgents of all kinds without question, using its ruthless efficiency, tactical cunning and fighting prowess to kill countless people. Whether or not they were innocent never mattered. It knew several had been civilians and that never made a difference. If Omega was to be believed, even its latest mission had resulted in destruction and possibly even death solely to stop people from delivering food and medical supplies to compromised populations. Such a thing couldn’t even be justified as a threat to the Empire, if it was true, and CX-2 hadn’t bothered to determine whether or not it was.

It killed all those clones on Teth.

It cut off Crosshair’s hand and taunted him as it did.

It even tried on its final mission to execute Omega!

“Talk to us, Tech,” Omega’s voice spoke soothingly overhead, making its stomach twist into knots. “Can you tell us what you need? We just need to know, we can help.”

“You can’t,” CX-2 choked out bitterly.

“We can, and we will. Whatever you need, we love you-”

“You’re not real!”

The words left its mouth and the tension in its chest crumbled like wet flimsi. It hurt to acknowledge as much, but pretending this was anything other than what it was would only hurt worse when reality came crashing back.

“You’re not real… None of this is real,” It repeated. “You can’t help me or save me so stop - Stop saying that you can…”

Whichever one of them was holding its hand tightened their grip and it opened its eyes. Both of them wore matching expressions of horror and shock, but… But of course they did… The people in its memories would be upset to hear it talk like that…

Echo nodded demurely, and Omega’s eyes shone with unshed tears, but she gulped hard and steeled her expression first. “So… what do you think is happening?” She asked, her voice wavering just a touch.

“All of this… It only exists in my mind. It’s a… A malfunction…”

“Uh huh,” She said, looking him fiercely in the eyes, though her voice somehow grew calmer. “So like a… A vision? A fantasy? dream?”

“It… It is more likely a dream…” It replied, wondering where this was going. A dream did sound more probable, given the circumstances. Its body ought to be unconscious back on Terova, whatever state it was in. Echo was giving Omega a miserable, quizzical look, but she didn’t break CX-2 Tech’s gaze.

“Okay. If it’s a dream, then… What happens when you wake up?”

Tech’s eyes went wide with fear. “I-”

“I don’t mean where are you going to wake up,” Omega said steadily. “Or what will happen to you. You don’t know if the Empire has found you yet. I mean what will you do? What choices will you make if you have the chance to make them?”

Tech opened and closed his mouth a couple of times. He… Wasn’t sure. It really depended on his circumstance, didn’t it? The question would be entirely useless if he woke up in the Empire’s clutches again, or if they decommissioned him before he woke up at all. He hadn’t considered the possibility that the Empire would delay looking for him, though, that he might have to choose how to proceed.

“I… Would return to Colonel Bragg,” It said slowly.

“Is that what you want to do?” Omega asked gently.

“No,” Tech responded without hesitation. “I want to stay here.”

His answer surprised him a bit, but then again, it was true. That was what he wanted, even if he wasn’t supposed to, even if it was impossible. Echo seemed slightly surprised as well, jerking his head up with wet cheeks and a hopeful glint in his eyes.

Omega gave him a small grin, but she alone seemed unfazed by the admission, and when she spoke her voice was still strong. “Do you want to see your brothers again, too?”

“I-” Tech started, but his voice caught in his throat as several questions tore through his mind like razors. He did, of course he did, that should be obvious, but - but were they still alive? Were they safe? Would his tracker attract the Empire to them if they were or had Echo really disabled it? After ten years would there even be room for an unexpected guest in their domicile, nonetheless after he blew up the ship that served as their last one? And did… Did they even want him back, after everything he had done?

“Tech,” Echo said, giving his hand another trembling squeeze. “They want to see you… They’ve missed you so badly. You… You have no idea.”

Tech took several breaths, parsing out everything he knew and turning those words over in his mind as if to analyze them. No matter which way he looked at them, though, it didn’t change his answer to Omega’s question. The heart monitor beeped a couple of times just before he opened his mouth to give his answer.

“I do want to see them,” He conceded, his eyes flickering between Omega and Echo in anticipation. “If that is true. That they… Want me back.”

There was something fragile in his voice when he said it, but Echo nodded warmly at him and lifted Tech’s hand in his own, touching both their knuckles to his cheek with a small sniffle. Omega’s face broke into a blinding smile, even as she finally blinked the tears from her eyes and hastily wiped them away with the edge of her sleeve.

“They do. I promise,” She said brightly. “I think the medics want to run just a couple more tests on you to make sure you’re healing well enough to travel, but as soon as that’s done, I can bring you home.”

---

Tech hadn’t been sure what to make of their conversation from before. Even as the medics returned to test his mobility, check his vitals, and attend to his surgical sites, the idea of going home seemed strangely surreal. If this were a dream it would make more sense to simply skip to that part rather than be subjected to these tests. For one awful moment, he had realized the possibility of his body being tested on in real life, all the cold pricks and sharp prods a mental manifestation of whatever final experiment Colonel Bragg was subjecting him to prior to his decommissioning. If that were the case he might not make it to his brothers again after all, he may run out of time, the world could go black and he may never see their faces!

The heart monitor went off again and Echo talked him through those particular fears, shooting impatient glares at the medics as Tech did his best to focus on Echo rather than his thoughts or all the unpleasant sensations, and suddenly it was over. Tech was vaguely aware of someone declaring him fit to be released, but Omega let out a cheer and helped him down from the bed, and then they were walking, Echo on one side and Omega on the other. The pair of them led him through ship halls that were far from imperial, passing people who Tech could too easily imagine having on the other end of his blaster. They reached the hangar and boarded a ship Tech knew he had just shot down, one that bore an uncanny resemblance to the Marauder in places, and yet it wasn’t. It couldn’t be… He had destroyed that ship ages ago, after dedicating so much of his own time and care into its maintenance and customization…

“Welcome back to the Havoc Zillo!” Omega said enthusiastically, gesturing around the inside of the ship with pride. “She’s fully functional again so don’t worry about a thing. The trip is a shorter one. Hope you still like varos flavored rations.”

Tech nodded, looking around the ship in a bit of a daze. A droid waddled towards him with frantic, familiar sounding gonk gonk’s.

“I know, Gonky!” Omega grinned. “He’s starting to do better, I’m excited too.”

The GNK droid stopped just short of colliding with Tech and leaned itself forward towards his hand. Tech obliged with a small, warm smile of his own, resting the mechanical arm on it’s oversized top, and it let out a series of soft gngngngngngnk’s.

“Aww. He remembers you,” Echo crooned.

“Droids memory banks are not like sentients. Their data recall is significantly-”

“Oh I know, Tech,” Echo chuckled. “It’s still sweet.”

Omega had skipped her way to the cockpit already and the outer door hissed shut behind them. For a moment Tech grasped at the nearest console to steady himself as she prepared for takeoff, but he barely felt the lurch as they left the ground and the ship left the hangar behind.

She had learned well, after all.

For a second, Tech gazed at the blur that was the back of her head down the hall, considering it. This was a dream, it had to be, but… This Omega was older than in his memories, no longer the naive adolescent female who chose to sit with them in the cafeteria and picked a food fight in their defense. Granted, she had grown beyond that well before his time with the Empire, but this was something else entirely. Even if what he was seeing now wasn’t real… He hoped that the young girl he knew back then had gotten the chance to grow into someone like this. His brothers deserved the chance to raise her this way, even if he never got to see it.

Then, his eyes slid just past her, to a place on the console where a blurry object sat, glinting against the black expanse of space in the viewport behind it.

“Those are yours,” Echo said softly at his side. “Do you want to see them?”

Tech wasn’t quite sure what to say, he couldn't even see what the object was with his poor quality eyesight, but the statement made curiosity flare up inside him, and he nodded. Echo got up and crossed over to the cockpit, whispering a couple of things to Omega before taking the little item in his one hand and returning.

Echo held them out, and Tech recognized them at once.

“My goggles,” Tech said in astoundment, taking them gingerly in his hands. He had seen them before in the memories but they really did feel familiar in his hands now, too. Both the lenses were shattered and one was missing several chunks, they wouldn’t function without significant repairs but… But they were his.

Nothing had been his in years. It shouldn’t matter, he knew it in his head, but somehow it did. This should be a dream but the familiarity of something that was his own in his hands just felt so real, and if this was real…

Through the gap in the hall Tech saw as the color outside the cockpit changed from pitch black to fuzzy streaks of blue as Omega put the ship into hyperspace, and his breath caught in his throat.

“You should know,” Echo said under his breath, “Even if you weren’t there… She never flew without you.”

He nodded at Echo’s words, unable to speak, and held the goggles close to his chest, just in case they were real.

Link to the full story written in full fledged domicile angst here: Implications Of Being Alive

Please scream in my comments or something, I live for validation I guess, it’s fine 🫠❤️

Oh and I guess I should do a tag list for this, maybe? If that’s wanted? Lemme know if I should and if you wanna be on it!!!

[wonijinjin]

THE WEEKND SERIES: DIE FOR YOU - LEE SEOKMIN

author’s note: this might be a bit of an odd choice for a softie like dk, but you can see how his love for you is infinite.

synopsis: the inevitable meeting of the supernatural and humans comes in a form of love, but is it really worth it?

word count: 0.5k | genre: fluff, angst, dark themes (vampires) | pairing: dk x gn! reader | warnings: mentions of reader having pale skin (vampire), blood, vampires, fangs

the masterpost of this series can be found here.

“so here it is, you have found out my secret.” you said with head hanging low. you were embarrassed by the fact that dk had to see you with fangs out, hunger so strong it was visibly eating you up from the inside. before he could reply you collapsed into his arms, weak legs giving out under your own weight. he caught you with ease, looking at you with a pityful expression. “you are hungry, aren’t you sunshine?” he asked gently while helping you stand straight again. “i should need blood or a supplement from time to time to function properly, but i have never drunk it!” you raised your arm in defense. “i could never, i cannot bring myself to do so. i am honestly disgusted and ashamed by this whole thing.” you said in a sad tone, upset that the person you loved the most in this world had to endure this quality of yours. he thought for a moment before looking at you again. “but won’t you get weaker if you don’t drink real blood? i cannot let you get sick, i’ve read about it somewhere.” you raised a brow and cracked a smile at this; he was the biggest scaredy cat, so you wondered how he came across something that contained information about vampires. “you should drink some blood.” he insisted. “i cannot do it dk, i don’t want to become a monster. i hate this situation enough already, now that i’ve found you i cannot risk you getting disgusted by this.” you pointed to your fangs, which were shining proudly in the daylight. “then if you don’t want to do it with someone else, do it with me.” he grinned. your eyes widened at his statement; you didn’t want to believe your ears. how could’ve you possibly asked your soulmate to do that for you? “minnie, look at me.” you said firmly while grabbing his face between your hands. “this is serious. what if i hurt you? what if you…” you took a shaky sigh. “die?” he puts his own palms around yours, caressing them with his long finger. “sunshine, you would never hurt me, never, ever. i know you wouldn’t.” he kissed your pale cheek softly, then pulled away again. “you are my soulmate, i would do anything to see that you are well. i would even die for you, sunshine.” with this he pushed your head into his neck cautiously, letting you inhale his scent. it was getting harder and harder to bite back the urge to taste him. “go ahead sweetheart, i trust you.” he whispered against your hair while shooting you, who had started crying. “then please don’t die.” you silently prayed to whoever was above while you sank your teeth into him.

[walkingstackofbooks]

DS9 2x22 The Wire thoughts (I'm re-watching, so there may be future spoilers)

I'm so excited to watch this again!

I guess we don't know that Julian had the choice to "entertain one of his lady friends" the night before, but I certainly choose to believe he did, he wanted to finish Garak's book more :p

Garak's stammering in "Doctor, what do you think you're doing?" :3

"In my expert medical opinion, I'd say it's sick." XD

"Keiko would be proud of you." Hah - the thing is I can imagine the overly-excited Julian telling her about this at some point and her just sweetly saying "well done, I'm impressed" but in her teacher voice she uses for seven year olds

"It's not like you two are really friends." Julian is NOT being subtle here that at the very least he WANTS to be real friends 😅 this man and lying...

Okay and now he's stabbing the plant with the hypospray because he's so frustrated with not being able to help Garak

VERY dramatic entrance, doctor.

😬😂That looked suspiciously like Quark was miming giving Julian oomax while saying "maybe a late night session in a holosuite".

"Try not to yell at any more admirals for a while." "I wasn't yelling. I was just expressing my feelings. Loudly." Gotta love Sisko

Oh, his poor dejected face at the information recurring taking weeks :3

Love how Julian is called to take care of Garak - this isn't Dr Bashir being called, it's not a medical emergency. It's Julian being Garak's only known friend who's requested.

Is it just me or did Julian check Garak or when he said "We'll go to my quarters"?

That drink exchange was VERY smooth of Quark and Julian

"I routinely monitor all of Quark's subspace communications." "Is that legal?" XD

"I see your point"... That's actually the exact same phrase as altered!Julian uses in Dramatis Personae - only this time it's ihm agreeing to do something questionable with Odo, last time it was to do something reasonable with him.

" I hope you don't have one of those little bugs hidden in my quarters." "Should I?" What's the betting Julian's going to be paranoid about this for a few weeks?

Julian's "What?! *sigh*" after being told Garak had left the infirmary. Idk it gave me feels.

I'm here for his Angry Pacing

"Doctor, did anyone ever tell you that you are an infuriating pest" "Chief O'Brien all the time, and I don't pay any attention to him either." That answer came SO quickly, he didn't even have to think about it

"I'm a doctor. You're my patient. That's all I need to know" JULIAN I CANNOT WITH YOU

Ohh, his sad looking downness <3 <3

Endless endless compassion, I love you so much

"Right now I'm not concerned with what you did in the past. I'm simply not going to walk out of here and let you die. We need to turn that implant off and whatever withdrawal symptoms or side effects you may experience, I promise I'll help you through them." Is he really not in love with Garak?! Because this is some gay shit Julian Subatoi Bashir. GAY I tell you

"In that case I want to talk to him now. Wake him up." "I'll do no such thing." "Doctor, these are murder cases and Garak may be a suspect." "That may be so, but he's still my patient and I won't have him disturbed." I am WILD about calmly resolute Doctor Bashir

I love a sleepy Julian :3

Garak's manic speech is incredible. WHAT a performance. My word. I couldn't look away.

" I can't believe that I actually enjoyed ... staring into your smug, sanctimonious face." Staring into Julian's face sounds pretty gay to me, Garak. (Who wouldn't enjoy staring at it though?)

Ah yes, wrestling on the floor with your alien crush while he is out of his mind. Definitely never happened before in Trek. No parallels here to be drawn.........

"I don't want to hurt you." And presumably he actually could.

Julian whizzing through all the samples, brining one back having seen it for all of 2 seconds and immediately knowing which one to overlay it with. THAT SEEMS PRETTY GENETICALLY ENGINEERED TO ME. I swear I don't know how that crackpot retcon worked so well, but it DOES

"More than I deserve." Oooh, callback to earlier int he episode when he said "Has it ever occurred to you that I might be getting exactly what I deserve?" .... My HEART

"I've about given up on learning the truth from you, Garak."I The FONDNESS with which he SAYS this!

"We were closer than brothers...."Sons of Train" welp, that's the 'true' bit

Holding handsssss!!!

There's no way Sisko sanctioned this, right? Did Julian just steal the shuttle craft?!

Okay then, just beam into the house of someone you know to be extremely dangerous and start poking around?! Your curiosity, Julian, I swear...

*wide smile* "I always drink Tarkalian! ..." -suddenly realises that this is VERY personal information Tain has on him- "...Tea."

Did he just GIGGLE? *rewatches* Yep, it's definitely there - "Are all the Starfleet Lieutenants as brash as you are?" "I couldn't say - hehe - though I doubt it."

"I thought you were his friend." "I suppose I am." YES HE SAID IT that's the first step

"Information is your business." Julian you are bold as BRASS

"he'll never come home again" oof, knowing the double meaning of home as Cardassia and to Tain

The disappointment in Julian's face at the answer to his "Who was Elim?" question

Ohhh, that last conversation. Julian's so damn fond of him. That smile at the end. They ARE in love.

Well this was delightful. What a good episode. I had forgotten, and wasn't sure if it had just been hyped up. But no. Truly phenomenal. Thanks, DS9!

[bengiyo]

Tokyo in April is... Ep 4 Stray Thoughts

Last week, Kazuma and Ren began their FWB relationship. It has strict rules about how they interact. Ren doesn't face him during sex, the lights stay off, and Kazuma leaves after. They stay friendly at work with no mention of it. They also hook up every day. Kazuma seems to recognize that there's something huge holding Ren back, and decides to be patient and present for now. Meanwhile, Ren put the whole company on his back to save an ad campaign after their actor was caught up in a scandal.

Trigger Warnings for this episode: Striking a minor, discussion of sexual assault, implied harm and suicide attempt, aftermath of implied sexual assault.

One of the fun things about a show where the characters are in an active sexual relationship, is any time you're present for the sex you immediately know that there are emotional stakes in play.

I love Kazuma. I like that he can feel that Ren was tired and needed closeness. I love that he turns that into an opportunity for Ren to do something for him instead.

I'm expecting the color gays to say something about this orange shirt matching the shelves later.

I'd be overwhelmed if I was Ren, too. He has fairly-valid reasons to believe that his feelings were one-sided. He's been protecting his heart in this arrangement, but now he's forced to see how real Kazuma's feelings (which have been expressed clearly since they met again) are.

See, and I totally get Ren misunderstanding Kazuma as teens. This feels a little like Lee Wan and Shin Ki Tae in Our Dating Sim, where Wan just could not comprehend that Ki Tae could also like him.

I don't have the words to convey how sad I am that Ren believed he coerced Kazuma into sex, and felt he needed to say that to their parents because he needed to be honest about all of the events that transpired to ensure that Kazuma received effective care for his condition.

It's awful to watch, but I appreciate a mom striking the self-proclaimed assailant of her son.

An exacto knife? Fuck me.

That was intense. I like delivering the history Ren has kept to himself as he breaks over the answer he's always wanted. That Ryunosuke guy had clearly heard of Kazuma before.

Kazuma is such a boy. They got the jock-turned-diligent-office-worker energy correct.

A home cooked meal shot from the side with the kitchen available in the back. I know that this is probably a fairly standard Japanese apartment layout in Tokyo, but this is sending me all the way to What Did You Eat Yesterday? I like this shift after such a heavy sequence.

Finally, a show for the quiet gays like me. I'm not surprised the same director as Our Dining Table is involved. Those boys were also Quiet Gays (Yes, I know Minoru is bi. Let me have fun). After a rough week or two at work, just taking a day to lazily enjoy each other's company is so nice compared to some date at a sponsored location.

Ren is staying over and we're getting a domestic gay montage. I am living!!

It's hard not to notice that Ren never removes that wristband now.

Oh, timing Kazuma saying that the only thing that matters to him is Ren as Ren strokes Kazuma's sleeping face is the most touching "it's mutual" thing I've seen in a while that also reflects the characters. Kazuma will say it. Ren will show it.

The framing around a coworker leaving, ominous energy about Sanada, warnings from the pissed former employee, the info in the past, and now the actor facing over 1300 sexual harassment charges.... Implications unpleasant about Sanada and that management may already know.

Yes, please dry his hair. You are a BL boy who almost died from being soaked in the rain ten years ago. We cannot repeat our mistakes.

This conversation about just taking a bath was refreshingly gay for me. I like the tacit acknowledgement about mess.

Ah, and there's the overt confirmation about Sanada. That women looked out of it.

DRAMA NEXT WEEK WITH WORK.

This was simultaneously an incredibly sad and heavy episode, but also one of the softest and most domestic things we've had in a while. The Japanese teams are really good at that balance. You can feel Ren finally softening and letting Kazuma in. The rapport between them is solid. They feel older than a lot of the pairings we've had in Japan despite just being in their mid-20s. This is really such a fantastic show.

[milkytheholy1]

There's no reason to be sad

A/N: Have a load of trash, think of it as a sequel of sorts to Starlit Night. It can also stand as its own thing, there's no real connection between the two and its mainly just me rambling. Enjoy!

Tech x GNReader

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The air was cold against your skin, nothing that sent your body into shivers, but cool enough to chill your heated thoughts. The luscious grass beneath your feet almost tickled, it swayed with such elegance, practically begging you to take a seat. 

And so you did.

Touching the green blades with the tips of your fingers, skimming the blanket of the natural world with the palm of your hand. The night sky towered above you, stars and far-away galaxies twinkling in a synchronised dance. You've spent most of your lifetime in the stars, and yet you never grew tired of looking at them. The sounds of the old, tired ship behind you raptured the tranquil silence that once surrounded your form. 

You could faintly hear his paced breaths as he manoeuvered over towards you, taking in the slope of your back to memory. Unlike before, he sat down the moment he got close enough to you. Plated armour brushing up against the bare skin of your arm, hard plastoid lightly scratching soft flesh. 

"Are we doing this again?" his voice was almost a whisper, you could see his eyes trail over you with a swift glance. You ducked your head between your folded knees, a sigh brushing past your lips, "Doing what?"

He didn't seem happy with your response, you could tell by the dip of his goggles and the crease in his brow, "This," he emphasised with his tone. Finally using a finger to shift the goggles further up the bridge of his nose, "I have counted you seeking peace at least six different times in the last 4 rotation periods. Clearly, you are suffering from some form of issue, what is the problem?"

You hid away from his words, no matter how true they were. You whipped your head back up to face the stars, just staring out into nothingness, "I-" you started, words dry on your tongue. Your eyelids closed and crinkled in frustration, "I...I don't know what's wrong with me, Tech. Sometimes I feel sad, sometimes I feel stressed when I know I have nothing to be stressed about and it's just-" you let out a harrowing breath, "It's just too much."

The bespeckled Clone sat silent beside you, allowing you to finish your brave ramblings. He was torn, does he choose to watch you while your heart bled or does he choose to follow your gaze and peer at the night sky?

You turned to look at him, lips quivering and goosebumps raised along your arms, "When I'm out here, looking at the stars, it helps me forget. I can't be stressed or sad when I'm looking at the stars." you turned back to gaze at the picturesque scenes above you, "Stars can't be sad."

Tech coughed awkwardly into his fist, "Technically speaking, stars cannot feel emotions. They are masses of gas and-" he cut himself short, seeing your broken expression was far more important than the facts and lifespan of a star. Sitting a little straighter, Tech offered you a consoling look, "I may not be the best at these types of situations, I believe as Wrecker once put it I am 'As emotionless as a droid' but I do acknowledge some comfort may help you."

He offered his arms out to you, embracing the thought of you being tucked into his chest. You shifted in your place, dragging your limbs closer to his warmth while you nestled your face against his neck. The crook of your nose rubbed against his adam's apple, while his fingers danced along your shoulder blades.

"I don't think you're as emotionless as a droid," you whispered, sleep clawing at your feet. Tech let out a small chuckle, clutching you closer, "Thank you, my dear."

This wasn't the first time Tech had comforted you, but it had been a long time since the last occurrence. You were sat on a hill similar to this one, the tree branches swung in the gentle breeze, the birds sang and the night sky was still just as beautiful. Back then you weren't sad or stressed, you had Tech by your side and your crew behind you. 

Perhaps because it was the night when Tech had first kissed you, confessed his want for you. Ever since you had been going steady, you had nothing to be sad about; and yet there was this deep, dark feeling inside of you that you just couldn't shake.

Tech's arms brought you back to the present, the hardness of his armour dug into your sides; but you didn't care at this point. You were too absorbed in the sights, the sounds, the smell that was Tech. 

"Is this helping? I read on the holonet that physical comfort can help those who are feeling less than adequate with themselves." 

You slid a dainty hand up towards his cheek, tapping your fingers lovingly against the roughness of his skin. You could feel his head lean into the motion, an unconscious action that sent your skin alight. You could feel a warmth spread from your fingertips, you could hear the sound of his lips pulling away, feel the love he passed through to you from such a small action.

"This is helping," you muttered, eyes blinking shut, "Thank you, Tech." your breathless whisper caught him off guard. Ever so gently he looked down at you, short breaths puffed out of your lips, eyelashes dusting your cheeks, you were better than any stars he had ever seen. He knew he had to pick you up and carry you back to the ship, but that could wait. Tech wanted to sit and enjoy the vast galaxy above him, for once he wanted to see what the world had to offer and not something on his holopad.

But deep down he knew he was being selfish, he just wanted to spend more time with you. In the quietness of the hill you both sat on top of, with the hum of the Marauder in the background and the footfalls of those who inhabited it. Resting his head gently against your own, Tech released his own sigh.

"You are welcome, my love."

[fancyfade]

19, 22, 24 and 38 :) Have a nice day.

ok i tried to find the last ask game i reblogged hopefully these were it :P

19 favorite superhero family

hmmm this one is hard.

probably batfam, just based on focus and blorbos :P (though they also have so many comics so its easy to continue the focus)

I say it's hard because I did get possessed to read every single aqua solo title that existed. but also batman has way more so even if i was possessed to read every battitle ever i would not be able to...

22 favorite robin

Damian obviously :P Best Robin of all time 0 competition whatsoever.

24 if you had total control what would you change?

okay total control SO MUCH IS GOING TO CHANGE

OK just starting a list.

Give Wonderfam and Aquafam 2 monthly titles like Batman and Superman have. Wonder Woman for main Diana stuff, Sensation comics for Wonderfam, Aquaman for main arthur stuff, Adventure comics for aquafam

Limit # of Battitles. Bruce as Batman does not need multiple titles

Set a new Chronicles of Atlantis (not my original idea but i like it) to synthesize pre new 52 aquaman lore and post new 52 aquaman lore and establish what is canon b/c I DONT THINK ANY AQUA WRITER ACTUALLY KNOWS ATM

Honestly like... get rid of most of Zdarsky's batman run. You may notice lots of Retcons here but like. what does Zdarskys's batman run bring, in tone, that 'Tec does not do 40000 times better? It also cannot exist simultaneously with 'tec. only one of these stories can exist in current canon, and only one of them is good, so ... goodbye zdarsky's batrun.

New 52 onward garth is just an OC or guy from another universe (whatever they did with new 52 roy) and real garth with his character development is going to come back

Babs - some retcons. Either a similar thing with new 52 onwards babs just being misfit with amnesia (a headcanon I saw that I liked) or giving some new 52 Babs as Batgirl plots to Steph, keeping oracle stuff as Babs, and have Babs back as a para in her wheelchair and Oracle with her character development intact

Retcon all of the character assassination associated with Glass's run on Teen Titans 2016. no half-assed williamson stuff like 'uwu he was sad because of alfred's death'. actual retcons.

Retcon Morrison Talia and re-write Damian's childhood to be done mostly without Talia before he was 8 and she just was not aware of his existence due to (shenanigans). I'm doing my own shot at this in my fic The Way My Mother Didn't Raise me (link)

Give Tim Drake a character arc to make him move on from Robin for real.

probably more but i dont want this post to be 400000 words long

38 - who do you think is the most overlooked and underused character?

you know i am gonna go with helena kosmatos. even in the team comic she was introduced in she was quickly shoved to the side to be a love interest for a boring guy.

but like. how is a teenager girl with murderous rage that granted her superpowers due to furies not fun? do people remember being a teenage girl? also shes kind of indirectly* responsible for her brother's death after she blames him for their mom's death when their mom finds out he was collaborating with nazis. there's a lot of angst potential here.

*I say indirectly b/c it was unclear how much was tisiphone possessing her, while she expressed desire for her brother's death verbally i'm p sure she was very much tisiphone at that time

ty for asks!